Justice

Drudge reports the Swiss are holding Roman Polaski for extradition to the United States. If memory serves, Polaski drugged and assaulted a 13-year old girl in Jack Nicholson's hot tub. I wonder if Polaski's apologists will try a variation of the Ted Kennedy/Mary Jo Kopechne excuse--that the victim would agree the culprit's accomplishments were worth it.

Some Day, When I Am King

September 25th will be a national holiday in honor of her birthday:

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Gratuitous Nats Posting (TM) - "Holy Cow!" Division

Did anybody else out there catch the Nats' 5-4 win over the Dodgers last night? That had to be one of the craziest ball games I've seen in a loooooong time, and a real cliff-hanger 'til the end.

Nice that the Nats were able to stave off their 100th loss for at least one more night. Think they can hold out for the rest of the season? With seven games left, I doubt it.

Not giving up hope, though.

GO NATS!!!

The ACORN Empire Strikes Back

Via HotAir. Time for the defendant to hit the books and come up with a good counterclaim. Game on!

The World Wonders - OUCH! Division

Why is it that whacking your kneecap on the edge of your desk can produce such a sensation of nausea?

Any docs out there care to explain? It won't make me feel any better, but at least it would put teh sick on an academic footing.

The Factor

Coaching advice you can use:

India's cricketers at the Champions Trophy in South Africa are being encouraged by their coach to have sex to boost their on-field performance, a newspaper reported on Wednesday.

The benefits of sex feature prominently in a secret document circulated among players by coach Gary Kirsten and mental conditioning expert Paddy Upton, the Hindustan Times said in a front-page report.

It came as India take on arch-rivals Pakistan in their first Champions Trophy match in Centurion on Saturday.

Back when I was rowing crew in college, we in fact had a "no noogie" rule during the spring season. Personally, I thought it was absolute nonsense. Did I break it? Well, all I'll say is that I was the smallest and weakest guy on the team and needed all the performance-enhancement I could get.

Obama As University President

Courtesy of the incomparable Victor Davis Hansen at NR.

I Doubt Mrs. LMC Will Need These Anytime Soon

I stopped off at the local Rite Aid to fill prescriptions written by the OB after taking my bride and the baby home from the hospital earlier this month. Not knowing what they were, I passed them to the pharmacist and told her they were not for me, but for my wife. The gal glanced at the scripts and laughed because one of them was for birth control. Not sure why contraceptives are necessary; I doubt my bride will be receptive to as much as an optimistic look for the foreseeable future.

Apropos of Nothing

A little Joan Jett, just because she had a birthday recently.

Baby Ellie Chronicles

Mrs. LMC observed that sleep deprivation can produce its own psychosis. I understand now why it is in the toolbox for "enhanced interrogation." Sleep comes in three hour increments and the burden falls most heavily upon Mrs. LMC. She is making more noises about how great it will be to get away with The Butcher's Wife for some girlie-girl weekend this winter. I wonder why . . .

Yips! from Robbo: Remember, the Mandatory Hot Tub Photos Rule will be strictly enforced.

The Changing of the Guard

The Nats need to win six out of their last nine games in order to avoid tying last year's loss record of 102. They have the potential to go 51-107.

Meanwhile, the Fins drop to 0-2 because of that showoff Peyton Manning.

Pardon me while I bang my head on the keyboard for a little bit.

qpwuierturi

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Thankew!

In a way, I kinda like the dead time between the Super Bowl and baseball's opening day simply because it allows my blood pressure to drop back down to a healthy level. Thank Heaven I have no interest in basketball or hockey, or I'd probably have blown a gasket a long time ago.

If You Have Had It With The Goodnight Show

on the Sprout channel, and want to throttle "Caillou", this is for you.

Frog-Marching Toward Oblivion

HM Government takes another brave stand:

Global warming has led to a change in [British toads'] breeding and migrating patterns and this has forced the Department for Transport into a rethink on the rules which governing temporary road signs.

As the law stands councils can only put up "migratory toad crossing" signs between February and May.

But under the changes announced by the DfT these signs will go up in January giving the toad – officially a "biodiversity priority species" – an extra month's protection.

It is estimated that there are around eight million toads in Britain, rather fewer than there were just after the war.

The European Common Toad is found throughout the country, while the Natterjack is found in north west and southern England, according to John Wilkinson, research officer with Amphibian and Reptile Conservation.

"Because of changes in our climate they are breeding and migrating earlier in the year," Mr Wilkinson added.

Britain's toad population is under threat. "Toad mortality is very high on the roads. Once you used to see a flood of the creatures, now it is down to a trickle.

"They have also suffered because of a loss of habitat, a loss of woodland and the increased use of pesticides."

Earlier this year Froglife, a conservation charity, used Google Earth to map 700 toad crossings in Britain, in an attempt to cut amphibian mortality.

The changes to the sign regulations puzzled Edmund King, the AA's president.

"I suppose Mr Toad will have to be more vigilant for longer to make sure he doesn't squash little toads hopping across the road," he said.

"To be honest I have always wondered what drivers are supposed to do if they see amphibians in the road in front of them."

You know, it wasn't really all that many years ago that one could read an article like this, smile and mumble something about how there'll always be an England. Nowadays, what with free-falling native demographics, aggressive immigrant colonization and a near social and cultural bankruptcy? Not so much.

Ribbiting while Rome burns, I suppose one could say.

I Hate It When A Train-Wreck Comes Together

Our old pal the Chai-rista hasn't done a Truly Bad Film post in eons, but this might be enough to bring her out of retirement:

After months of speculation and official denials, The Hollywood Reporter confirmed that former UFC champ Quinton "Rampage" Jackson will take on Mr. T's role of B.A. Baracus in the movie adaptation of the 1980s show "The A-Team." It will be Jackson's biggest film role to date, and he beat out many other contenders for the part, including rappers Common and The Game.

Jackson joins Liam Neeson, who will play the team leader Hannibal, and Bradley Cooper, who is signed to play Faceman. Jackson recently cancelled a planned bout with Rashad Evans at UFC 107 in December to clear his schedule for the movie, which begins filming in the fall.

"The A-Team" will update the story from the show, replacing the team's Vietnam backstory with one set the Middle East. In a follow-up on Tuesday, The Hollywood Reporter said that Sharlto Copely, the breakout star of "District 9" is being considered for the team's fourth member, "Howling Mad" Murdock. Jessica Biel is also in talks to join the cast as a woman from Faceman's past who is hunting them all down. The movie is schedule for release on June 11th, 2010.

Look, I'd even go along with the updating of the backstory, but I'm sorry, there are just certain actors who own certain roles and cannot be replaced. Period. Liam Neeson in George Peppard's shoes? Are you kidding me? And who the hell is Bradley Cooper? I dunno, but he's no Dirk Benedict (the real Starbuck, also, but that's a different rant). And as for topping Dwight Schultz? No chance. Finally, how in the name of everything merciful can one replace Mr. T? Ah pity da fool who tries.

Frankly, I can't stand these remakes. (Yeah, I'm talkin' bout you too, Star Trek Reboot!) Memo to Producers and Directors: Go get your own damn stories!

The Lit'list Nats Fan

'Bout time Citizens Bank Park saw some payback.

You go, girl!

And Now, Idiots

"We Are The World" strikes again:

GENEVA — British rock group Duran Duran and heavy metal band Scorpions are among 55 world celebrities who have joined in recording a song to draw attention to the global warming crisis, organisers said on Monday.

The song is part of a mass media campaign on the threats of climate change organised by the Geneva-based Global Humanitarian Forum, headed by former UN secretary general Kofi Annan.

The song entitled "Beds'r Burning", which was originally recorded by the Australian group Midnight Oil in the 1980s, can be downloaded from the Internet for free and will be presented to the public at a launch in Paris on October 1.

"If we do not stop the (greenhouse gas) emissions today, global warming will be still be with us in 40 to 50 years," warned Walter Fust, director of the Forum, at a press conference in Geneva.

The media campaign featuring the song is aimed at putting pressure on world leaders to reach an agreement on tackling climate change at a UN-sponsored conference in Copenhagen in December.

Some of the other popular artists who add their voices to the anti-global warming song include French 'Piaf' actress Marion Cotillard, Senegalese star Youssou N'dour, Irish singer/composer Bob Geldorf, Chinese singer Khalil Fong, and even a Nobel peace laureate, South African archbishop Desmond Tutu.

I don't think I'm inching very far out on to the limb here when I suggest that celebrity rockers, together with the sort of people who attend international forums and UN-sponsored conferences, generate carbon footprints a whoooooooole lot bigger than those of the ordinary folks they're hectoring with their publicity stunts.

When Duran Duran goes to all-acoustic performances in daylight in non-HVAC-controlled concert sites, then maybe they can come and talk to me about what kind of lightbulbs I'm using.

Until then, they can jolly well bugger off.

Achtung!

Trash Nazis. Not just the name of a rock band anymore:

Households face fines of up to £500 for failing to recycle food scraps in Government plans to introduce a slop bucket into every home.

One on four councils already collect food waste separately in order to reduce the amount of biodegradable rubbish being dumped in landfill.

However under radical new plans backed by Hilary Benn, the Environment Secretary, every council would have to bring in the controversial new system.

In an effort to force every household to separate food scraps properly and put them in the right bin, councils would be able to introduce fines of between £80 and £500.

The plan was first suggested by Mr Benn earlier this summer. He said it was ridiculous to keep on dumping biodegradable waste like food, which could be burned for energy or processed for biofuel, in landfill – especially when the UK faces massive fines from the EU for continuing to dump so much rubbish.

He suggested a ban on dumping food in landfill that would force every council to introduce separate collections and dispose of the waste through incinerators, composting or anaerobic digestion.

Now Defra is officially consulting on the plan to bring in a landfill ban on food waste following research from other countries that showed how successfully it can cut the amount of rubbish going into holes in the ground.

This will mean councils will have to invest heavily both in providing households with the new brown “slop buckets”, introducing new weekly collections and building the equipment to deal with the waste.

It is up to councils how to bring in the new system, but many will choose to threaten households with fines if they fail to comply.

Councils generally issue a warning before imposing on-the-spot fines of between £80 and £110 for failure to put out bins on time, overfilling wheelie bins or putting the wrong rubbish in each container.

And under new council rules, every adult at an address, rather than just the head of a household, could be fined, meaning a family of five or group of students living together could end up paying more than £500 in total.

In pilots separate food waste collections proved popular with most households but there were concerns about odour from keeping food waste in the kitchen and fears that some households will end up with up to five bins because of the need to separate other materials for recycling.

Just think of the Brownshirts tooling about in their trash-detector vans, nicking non-slop-bucket-compliant householders. Rather makes you wonder why Churchill bothered.

Gratuitous Nats Posting (TM) - Spoiler Alert

So over the past six games, the Nats have taken one off the Phillies (which is too bad, especially given how close the two losses were), and two off the Fish (which is better). We're done with the Fish, now, but we have one more home stand against the Phils.

For a while I was trying to decide which of these teams I wanted to do down the more. But after some reflection, I think I'll just fall back on the T-shirt slogan Peej O'Rourke once saw on some Middle Eastern militia-type: "Kill Them All - Let God Sort Them Out."

By the way, for those of you shocked by the Presidents' Race video below, let me just tell you that I had a terrific conversation with a fellow Nats fan yesterday:

Me: I've got a "Let Teddy Win!" bumper sticker.

She: I've got a "Let Teddy Win!" t-shirt!

Me: I just posted the Youtube of his disqualification the other night for "feline interference" on my blog.

She: I was at the game!

Heh, indeed.

So scoff all you want. We few, we happy few, we band of brothers don't care. We love our Nat'nals and we love our Presidents' Race. So there.

GO NATS!!

Gratuitous Monday Morning Observation

Vroooom!!!

What was that?

That was your weekend, mate.

Oh, that's nice. Do I get another?

Sorry, mate.

Oh, well. Back to the world of dreams......

So Now We Know

what the Administration gave to get those journalists back from North Korea: bilateral talks with Kim Jong Il, timed for release on weekend. It matters because the North Koreans refuse to deal with South Korea on anything substanitive. I doubt the Seoul or Tokyo were consulted. So much for the multilaterial, do-not-go-it-alone approach of The New Era. Everything comes at a price. Via Drudge.

Lest We Forget

Fly our flag today to mark eighth anniversary of the 9/11 attacks. Never forget we are at war with radical Islam. Remember the victims, their families, and all who risk their lives to protect their fellow citizens.

Yips! from Robbo: I would suggest that the steady transformation of our response from a military action to a police matter, coupled with the the fact our Body Politic is now consumed in debates over the socialization of medicine and the instituting of green fascism demonstrates that we've already long forgotten. And I fear that we won't remember again until we are most rudely reminded by the bad guys.

Sad. Horrifying, even. But there it is.

In Full View

Greetings, loyal camelidophiles.

Your Maximum Llama doesn't know why he's riffing again on the blogging shtick of another certain blogger well-known and esteemed round here. He just was seized by a whim. Your Maximum Llama is like that sometimes.

In any event, Your Maximum Llama had to drive up to northern New Jersey for a lunch meeting yesterday. Perhaps bemused by the discussion or else benumbed by it, Your Maximum Llama managed to forget to retrieve his credit card from the little waiter's folder thingy after signing the check. Your Maximum Llama did not actually discover this lapse until he stopped to gas up on the turnpike in southern New Jersey on the way home.

Your Maximum Llama really can be an idjit sometimes.

All was well in the end, though. One does not get to be Maximum Llama by cursing the darkness. Calmly, Your Maximum Llama blackberry'd the nooz to Mrs. Maximum Llama, who in turn dialed up the credit card company and froze the account.

Mrs. MLL was still on the phone with John Plastic when Your Maximum Leader rolled into the grounds of Orgle Manor, reviewing the account activity for the day. It was somewhat disconcerting to Your Maximum Llama to hear the ease with which he had been electronically tracked up and down the mid-Atlantic coast just by his purchases of gas, coffee and lunch. And this is nothing to the spoor he also left by using his EZ-Pass at all the toll-booths between Orgle Manor and his lunch destination.

Pondering all of this computerized real-time intelligence brought about in Your Maximum Llama the desire to go hide somewhere for a while.

Carry on yipping.

Lost By A Whiskah

This one is for the eldest Llama-ette - a clip of Teddy's apparent win of the Presidents' Race at the Nats game the other evening, only to be nullified for his illegal use of "That Cat" to stymie his competition:

Let Teddy Win!

I Could Not Help But Watch

the series premiere of the CW's Melrose Place, sort of the way people rubberneck as they pass a bad accident on the interstate. It has it all: pretty people with problems, a gal who will do what it takes to pay the med school tuition, a couger from the old series who winds up delivering her best performance to date (i.e., floating face down in the pool), a Rosario Dawson wannabe who can't decide if she should marry her shack-up, and a ruthless blonde who will lie to the police, trash monogamy, and end up engaging in the behavior Dr. Rusty finds acceptable because she is bored.

On the up side, LMC fav Daphne Zuniga had a cameo from the "series launch party" and looked no worse for the wear. Here she is, from way back when:

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Health Care Speech Bingo

Courtesy of the fine folks at National Review:

1. "The time to act is now."

25. "As I said in March, the time to act is now."

Llama PSA

How often have you said to yourself, "Self, how do the lyrics to the 'Llama Song' go again?"

Well, my friends, you need no longer scratch your head in baffled frustration at not knowing the answer, because the the Albino Blacksheep has got you covered.

Enjoy!

Yips! to Llama reader Edward for tossing that one into the Tasty Bits (TM) Mail Sack.

MIA Yips! from Gary:
Dang, I saw the "play" button. I resisted. I tried really, really hard. But I'm weak. Weak, I say! Now I've got that song stuck in my head AGAIN!! ARRRRGHHH!!!

Yips! back from Robbo: Wow! A tasty-bit comment from Steve-O and a yip from Gary all in the same week! Woo Hoo!!! (BTW, Steve, that Helen Hunt blow-up doll in the Zimmerman jersey? Can't. Get. Out. Of. My. Mind!)

Skewl Daze

In case you were wondering, none of the Llama-ettes will be seeing the President's address to the Nation's Schoolchildren today, as classes do not begin at St. Marie of the Blessed Educational Method until tomorrow.

The elder gels (and I'm still somewhat dazed at the idea that I have a 6th grader) are spending today with their Upper Elementary class on some kind of team-building retreat out in the country. Meanwhile, the youngest - who is starting her second year of Lower Elementary - is mooching about the school (and probably trying to burn it down) while Mrs. Robbo gets her classroom set up for tomorrow's onslaught.

Middle Age Fatherhood Chronicles

More random observations:

1. Having child at 46 when one's bride is 39 assures I will experience the joys of living in a household in which some occupants are in throes of puberty while another is in the grips of menopause. No doubt there will be a lot of mother-daughter drama. Fortunately, my son and I can take comfort in the paper and Fox News Sunday.
2. Much is written about going from man-to-man defense to zone when one's offspring numbers three or more. Unwritten is that you do not care if the baby gear is new or used, are not defensive about the baby going straight to formula without a stop to appease the breast-feeding fanatics, and feel no guilt about using the dishwasher to clean the bottles instead of an autoclave.
3. My son insisted last week that I take his "Transformers" pillowcase so now I must be the only dad in town whose head rests on top of the likeness of Optimus Prime (Bumblebee is on the other side).
4. The midlife crisis ride is a minivan with leather seats with plenty of power and enough room to fit a casket in the back. I won't be able to afford the sports car until Baby Ellie is out of college when I am 68. By then, I will be able to drive it for a dozen years or so to catch the Early Bird special at the Golden Corral before Mrs. LMC takes away the keys.

The Baby Ellie Chronicles

Mrs. LMC and Ellie came home yesterday afternoon and treated us to a night of little sleep. Random thoughts:
1. Our Little Debutante is not beyond attention-getting tactics now that the competition has arrived. Last night she announced she gave her bed its own little baptism, without a trace of embarrassment or regret. The pediatrician told my wife that our daughter will surprise us with her maternal instincts. One can only hope. The primary purpose of the baby monitor is to alert us whenever Our Little Debuante enters Ellie's room.
2. Ellie has to be held to sleep. Putting her in a bouncy seat or an oscillating swing is not an acceptable substitute.
3. KMR once observed the baby monitor is like an idol in an action movie set in a primitive culture. Sometimes it is harmless and at others it becomes an angry god which must be appeased.
4. I can still attach a nipple to a bottle of Similac with one hand while holding the baby in the other. As a matter of fact, I can feed her with one hand and blog with other. I am doing it now.
5. Last night's cable lineup included one of the worst sci-fi flicks ever: Krull. I watched most of it in the wee hours for the first time since I inflicted it on my college girlfriend in 1983. It has not improved with age although I note it had to be one of Liam Neelson's first gigs. I understand why he does not talk about it. If Chai-Rista was still blogging, I would nominate this awful movie for "Truly Bad Films."

Eleanor Elizabeth LMC, U.S. Army War College Class of 2056

Born yesterday at 11:23 p.m., 7 pounds, 15 ounces, and 19.5 inches long. She gave Mrs. LMC a good run for her money. The OB started the oxytocsin I.V. at 8:00 a.m. The "pushing" did not get going until 9:15 p.m. and delivery required the use of a vacuum extractor. The child took her sweet time coming into this world and I can only wonder how long she will make her dates wait before she decides she is presentable. Mother and child are fine; dad could use a beer.

Congrats!

I understand that just before midnight last night, Mrs. LMC was delivered of a healthy, happy, baby girl. Mother and daughter are doing just fine.

That Mr. & Mrs. LMC decided to pull a whammy on all the betters by naming their baby "Obamaya Tiberia LMC" is, at this point, only an unconfirmed rumor.

No doubt the LMC will clarify when he checks in.

Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip!

"Fire As They Bear!"

What with the near onset of fall, it's time once again to contemplate the militarization of the pumpkin.

First, there's its effectiveness as a naval weapon:

Then, of course, it has its uses for light field artillery as well:

Me, though, I guess I'm still mostly a fan of good, old-fashioned siege warfare, especially when it involves trebuchets.

Robbo Is Currently Listening To....

NPR, in its top-o-the-hour nooz breaks, is emphasizing that although the unemployment rate has now hit 9.7%, the actual pace of job loss is slowing. So this is really good news after all.

Spin, baybee, spin!

Welcome To The Bigs, Meat

In a matter of hours, Mr. & Mrs. LMC are due to find out what it is like to switch from man-to-man to zone defense, as they anticipate the imminent arrival of Child No. 3.

My advice? Play back. Let them have the short gains. Far better than letting them find the crease, go deep and burn you. Because given half the chance, that's exactly what they'll try.

Good luck! Yip! Yip! Yip!

Random Lawyer Observation

I'm sure that it would be relatively easy to find people who love, hate or are indifferent to most aspects of their legal practice: research, investigation, depositions, motions, negotiations, court time, etc.

But could you find me anyone who doesn't absolutely loathe the preparation of written discovery responses? I doubt it.

Bleh.

Random Commuter Observation

I simply cannot recall a more glorious first week of September here in Your Nation's Capital - cool, even crisp in the morning and pleasant all day long. We're at least two weeks ahead of where we ought to be in terms of early fall weather.

Must be global warming or sumpfin.

Gratuitous Ex-Nats Posting (TM)

Robbo has decided early that he's going to be rooting for the Dodgers to win the Series this year.

Why is this? Because the Nats just handed long-time infielder Ronnie Belliard over to them. We at Orgle Manor have always liked Ronnie, not just because he's a pretty good ball player but also because he's a good guy. And after he's faithfully stuck it out with the Nats through almost three progressively more horrible seasons, it's nice to see him now in a position where he has a shot at the championship.

The only problem here is that the Nats face the Dodgers the 4th week of September. We've got 26 games left in the season and are within 14 of racking up our second triple-digit loss tally. Every game is going to count, and it would be a terrible thing if we cracked that century mark at the hands of Los Angeles. I suppose one can only hope that they will already have secured their division by then and can afford to take the hits.

So GO, NATS!!! and GO (MOSTLY), DODGERS!!!

From Fat To Phat

The two or three of you who still do wander into Llama Central these days may have been surprised, had you attempted to do so this past weekend, by a "bandwidth limitation exceeded" error message.

Not being any kind of a techie, I didn't really know what that means, except that we Llamas evidently have been spending a little too much time with the La-Z-Boy and the Cheetoes lately.

Alarumed at the result, we instituted an emergency crash course in diet and exercise in order to fit back into our normal bandwidth. And as you can see now, our efforts were successful.

The Llamas: Lean, mean, fighting machines!

Yip! Yip! Yip!

Joss Whedon Is Putting The Firefly Band Back Together

A linky at Agent Bedhead over the weekend reported that Summer Glau is joining the cast of Dollhouse where Wash has already taken up residence as Alpha. One wonder if she will go River on bad guys:

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or Terminator:

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Now, if Whedon could only lure back Inara. . .

Drop Zone Coming Up, Stand In the Door!

Mrs. LMC is scheduled for an induction Friday morning, thanks to a kind-hearted OB who agreed 39 weeks is long enough. The baby's room has been repainted to a light pink (reminding us that we need to repaint the rest of the house). The crib which has served the LLama-ettes, the Future ROTC Scholarship Recipient, and Our Little Debutante now awaits its sixth occupant. One or two pieces of hardware vanished our the years but nothing that a quick trip to Home Despot and a bag of zip ties could not fix. Unfortunately, our contractor has not quite finished putting in new flooring in the family room, grumbling that there does not appear to be a right angle in the room anywhere. On we go . . .