What A Bunch Of Crap

The Eco-nazis are now saying our problems are all behind us, but not in a good way: "American Taste For Soft Toilet Roll 'Worse Than Driving A Hummer'"

Oh, the horror. The HORROR!

The tenderness of the delicate American buttock is causing more environmental devastation than the country's love of gas-guzzling cars, fast food or McMansions, according to green campaigners. At fault, they say, is the US public's insistence on extra-soft, quilted and multi-ply products when they use the bathroom.

Wiping while the Earth burns, I suppose.

"This is a product that we use for less than three seconds and the ecological consequences of manufacturing it from trees is enormous," said Allen Hershkowitz, a senior scientist at the Natural Resources Defence Council.

Three seconds? Uh, Allen - Y'all mind not standing up-wind of me? Thankee.

"Future generations are going to look at the way we make toilet paper as one of the greatest excesses of our age. Making toilet paper from virgin wood is a lot worse than driving Hummers in terms of global warming pollution." Making toilet paper has a significant impact because of chemicals used in pulp manufacture and cutting down forests.

Yeah, ranks right up there with nuclear proliferation and the gulag.

By the way, has anyone bothered to study the impact of having to put more soap down the drain as a result of all the extra hand-washing involved in dealing with inferior paper products? Not to go all Felix Ungar or anything, but one has one's standards of cleanliness. Unless one is a NRDC hippy, I suppose.

A campaign by Greenpeace seeks to raise consciousness among Americans about the environmental costs of their toilet habits and counter an aggressive new push by the paper industry giants to market so-called luxury brands.

More than 98% of the toilet roll sold in America comes from virgin forests, said Hershkowitz. In Europe and Latin America, up to 40% of toilet paper comes from recycled products. Greenpeace this week launched a cut-out-and-keep ecological ranking of toilet paper products.

Interesting, that hyping on the "virgin" forests. Religion may be dead to these people, but the symbols are still useful.

As for the trees, know why they're virgin? Because they're forests (mostly of very fast-growing slash pine) grown by the paper companies....specifically for the purpose of harvesting and turning into paper products! You may as well talk about "virgin" corn fields.

Oh, and here's the other thing. Let's say that, as Greenpeace wants, we embark on a massive campaign to use recycled products to wipe our heinies. Paper demand drops. Good news for the environment, right? Wrong! The paper companies, as eco-conscious as they have become, are not holding vast amounts of forest property merely for philanthropic reasons. They're in it for the money. If the land no longer pays, they're going to sell it. And at least in the Southeastern United States - where an awful lot of this kind of timbering occurs - do you know who is most likely to buy such holdings? I'll tell you from personal observation: Developers looking to build golf courses and retirement communities.

Now exactly how much more "eco-friendly" is that than farming the same land for trees?

Go read the rest of the article if you want, but as you can imagine, it kinda stinks.

How Else Are We Going To Pay For All This Sparkly Hay?

It is hard to believe that in this day and age we still live with the image in our collective conscience of some vast cohort of "The Rich" who, in order for the guv'mint to fund its unlimited vision of unicorns and lollipop trees, need only be compelled to belly up and start paying their fair share of income taxes.

Obama proposes spending $634 billion to overhaul the U.S. health-care system, partly paid for by limiting tax deductions for couples making more than $250,000 a year, an administration official said.

He will seek the money, to be spent over 10 years, in his first budget request to Congress today. About half would come from changes to Medicare, the health plan for the elderly, and the rest from the tax revisions, the official said. Limiting deductions for upper-income taxpayers is projected to generate $318 billion over 10 years, the official said.

Uh, huh. It's nice populist rhetoric, if you're into that sort of thing, but unfortunately, it's complete economic bunkum.

In the first place, according to FactCheck.Org, couples making more than 250K in adjusted gross income constitute a mere 3.1% of taxpayers. (They pay better than 43% of all personal income taxes already, but never mind that. The whole argument on the merits of the tax code as a tool of redistribution of wealth is best left for another day.) In the second, without even bothering to look it up, I'm going to bet that the 10 year projection of generated revenues is based on a static model, because the Donks have never quite come to grips with the concept that changes in a system of awards and penalties - here encapsulated in the marginal tax rates that "the Rich" pay on that extra dollar of income - cause changes in the behavior of people subject to it.

Christ, I'm an English major and even I understand that!

So. Crank the highest marginal rate and/or limit deductions. Go ahead! Why not? It makes good headlines. But sooner or later, those paying the taxes will decide they've had enough and will find alternate ways to bring in the readies (or simply decide that the extra dosh isn't worth it). Meanwhile, Uncle will notice that the revenue pool is shrinking (as is his portion of it). Concurrently, the projected expenditures on unicorns and lollipop trees will be revised upwards (because they always are). And before you can say snap, Uncle will decide that "the Rich" include everyone making better than $200K AGI. Then it'll be $150K. Then $100K. And so on.

Which brings me back to my original point: All those taxpayers experiencing a frissom of shadenfreude at the thought of The Rich getting sockoed had better enjoy it while they can, because Uncle is going to be at their door next.

Sass This Hoopy Action, Froods

The Cake Eater Husband sends along this link which, although I'm supposed to be spending the day in suitable penitential mode, and although I barely understand the gobbledy-gook of all the new whiz-bang technology that keeps appearing, nonetheless made me smile.

Perhaps I should invoke the "no pan-galactic gargle-blasters" rule, but then again, if you've got your towel handy there's really no need....

Bobby Jindal and Haley Barbour say "No Thanks"

Read about it over at NR.

Not just for Cosmo or Glamour

Mrs. LMC is off to the latest doctor's appointment, leaving yours truly to keep an eye on Our Little Debutante and the Future ROTC Scholarship Recipient. Casual perusal of a recent issue of Self magazine included a section on how to "liven things up." No wonder one of my soldiers referred to it as "porn for women."

Meet Dawn Johnson

The One's nominee to head the Office of Legal Counsel at Main Justice--Andrew McCarthy has much to say. Read it.

Hulu.com ad for Dollhouse

Hilarious:

[Bummer Yips! from Robbo: For some reason, these Hulu vids sometimes really foul up the formatting around here. The only fix that I know of is to yank them. Sorry 'bout that, guys.]

FRACK! Here is the linky for hulu.com. Use "Eliza" as a search term-the ad is easy to find. You will not be sorry.

They're BAAAAaaaack!!!

Spring training season starts tomorrow. Woo hoo!!!

VIERA, Fla. (AP) — John Lannan will start the Washington Nationals' first spring training game when the team travels to Kissimmee to play the Houston Astros on Wednesday.

Lannan, who was 9-15 with a 3.91 ERA last year in his first full season in the big leagues, is expected to go two innings.

"I'm not going to try to do too much," Lannan said Tuesday. "I'm still working on my breaking ball. I'm locating my pitches pretty well right now, which is good. I'm just trying to keep the ball down and throw as many strikes as I can."

Also slated to pitch for the Nationals are Shairon Martis, Garrett Mock, Gary Glover and Steven Shell.

The game is the first of 35 exhibitions for the Nationals. Spring training is a week longer than usual this year because of the World Baseball Classic.

And God bless Manny Acta for keeping his chin up:

Washington manager Manny Acta is optimistic about his team, mostly healthy thus far after an injury-plagued 2008 season that included 102 losses.

"This is the best team we've had in the three years I've been here," Acta said. "We have things here we didn't have before. If we don't go through mayhem like we had last year, I think these guys are going to be good. I have plenty of confidence about what we're going to do around here."

Fingers (and as many toes as possible) crossed. Injuries killed the Nats last year and were a big part of the 102-loss season. If everyone can keep healthy this year, who knows?

First regular season game is April 1. My theme for the season? Philadelphia Delenda Est!

GO NATS!!!

Oh, Khaaaaanada!

Yes! William Shatner wants to be Prime Minister of Canada.

The 'Star Trek' actor, who played Captain Kirk in the hit sci-fi TV show, is planning to make a dramatic career change and help lead his native country.

The 77-year-old star said: "My intention is to be Prime Minister of Canada, not Governor General, which is mainly a ceremonial position."

Shatner revealed his lofty ambition in response to a letter from a fan who urged him to put himself forward for the Governor General of Canada.

The Governor General is appointed by the monarch - which in Canada is currently Queen Elizabeth II - to perform the constitutional duties of the sovereign on her behalf.

In his letter, Shatner regretfully added: "I must, with my deepest thanks, turn down your honourable intent to advance me as Governor General. Besides which, I don't have time to be Governor General." Despite his busy schedule, the actor is confident he has what it takes to run the country, explaining: "As Prime Minister I can lead Canada into even greater exploits."

Ladies and Gentlemen, were Shatner actually to stand, I would seriously consider moving to the Great White North just to vote for him.

A Modest Proposal

There's lots of news today about the introduction of a bill in the Senate that, if passed, would give Dee Cee a voting seat in the House of Representatives.

It's unconstitutional, of course, but never mind. It goes exactly contrary to the intent of the Founders to keep any one state from having Uncle park himself there, but never mind. It will invariably lead to a demand for two Senate seats, too, but never mind. Why never mind? Because it's so unfair that residents of Dee Cee pay taxes but don't get to vote!

For many years now I have argued that if the folks of Dee Cee really want statehood and all the fixin's that go with it, then Uncle needs to take out his giant, fed'ral-sized X-acto knife. He needs to slice out the National Mall and the area immediately around it. He needs to cut out a few plots of land here and there with other large fed'ral edifices on them. He needs to stamp these parcels "Property of United States Government - Federal District." He then needs to collect up all the rest of the uncut-out bits and mail them to Maryland with his blessings.

Simple, really. Plus, there's already not much difference between Marylanders and Dee Cee'ers, except the fact that the Marylanders are much worse drivers. I know there's already a Ft. Washington, Maryland, which might cause a bit of confusion, but I'm sure the good folks of the newest addition to the Old Line State could come up with something creative if they felt the need for change. How about Obamaville?

Bubble, Bubble, Toil and Trouble

Steyn on El Rushbo on the state of the economy:

The Dow hit a ten-year low today, but don't worry, there'll be a new low along in a day or two. This was Rush on Friday:

The investors, the people who are the real poll on the state of the economy are not investing. They are betting on the market continuing to go south. . . . Folks, Obama doesn't have it . . . Biden doesn't have it. Reid doesn't have it, Pelosi doesn't have it, Barney Frank doesn't have it. There is nothing that is going to come along tomorrow and restore the value of your house, replenish your 401(k) and your kids' college fund, take the Dow back to 13 on the way to 15; it isn't there. It could be again, but not with the leadership we have now.

That sounds right. If the United States government got out of the way, things might get worse before they get better. With the government in the way, we have only the certainty of worse. Washington is engaged in the doomed project of attempting to re-inflate a credit bubble. Can't be done. But, in attempting it, they're massively expanding government spending and further distorting the rules of the market in the same ways that worked out so well for American home owners. And, as Iain noted below, the one group of people economic illiterates like Barney Frank don't seem to mind screwing over are the lenders - the investor class.

So why would you invest right now? From the point of view of investors in mortgage-backed securities, the "Hope for Homeowners" plan boils down to a government-mandated unilateral rewrite of the terms of your investment. It's different in degree from, say, investing in a copper mine in Africa and then finding that this week's president-for-life is going to nationalize without compensation. But it's not so different in principle. And, if you're an investor, what you have to ponder is whether the "Hope for Homeowners, Change for Mortgage Lenders" approach might soon spread to other areas of economic activity. Right now, that seems a safe assumption.

But relax, there'll be another economic summit, maybe as soon as Thursday. And in the afternoon breakout session they'll all wear blindfolds and try to pin the tail on the stimulus. ("Aaaaoow!" "Sorry, Nancy.")

Yesterday I noted that I was waiting for the market to bottom out before investing myself. On review, though, I see that some decimal points got omitted. Did I say a DJIA of 4000-4500? I meant to say 4.0-4.5

Random Commuter Observation

It's mornings like this morning, when I can feel my sinuses freezing over as I walk headlong into the chill, blustery north wind, that I try to remember in the depths of July and August while I'm staggering up the hill dripping with sweat.

Robbo, You Cannot Bring Up Blues Brothers without--

Random BSG Thoughts

1. So is Chief going to stay or go? One minute he talks with Adama about putting some magic Cylon stuff on Galactica's insides to keep her from flying apart and the next he wants to hit the road.
2. Tricia Helfer as Caprica- not bad, Helfer as random Cylon goop brush operator-not so great, Helfer as Baltar's invisible life coach: best.
3. Grace Park as Athena-good, Grace Park as Boomer-not so good.
4. Adama looks like he would be one mean drunk.

Flixster - Share Movies

Tricia Helfer: Cylon life coach

Robbo Is Currently Listening To.....*

(*with apologies to Mr. FLG for swiping his title meme)

I dunno. Maybe it's the Chicago connection or something, but for the past week or two every time I hear the term "government economic stimulus," this song pops into my head:

BTW, a few months ago when the DJIA dipped below 10,000, I toyed with the idea of scraping together some coin and investing in what looked to be some depressed bargains. I didn't wind up doing it and kicked myself for my sloth. Then the market dipped under 9000 and I went through the same mental process. Then 8000. Ditto.

Now? I don't feel so bad. In fact, I'm thinking of waiting until it gets down to about 4000-4500 and then jumping in. I reckon I've got a good two to three weeks to get up the necessary wodge of dosh before we hit that horizon.

The Only Gal Worth a Second Look on Sex and the City:

Turns 44 today:

Flixster - Share Movies

Kristin Davis.

RESISTANCE IS FUTILE

today, because it is Jeri Ryan's day, still going strong at 41:

Flixster - Share Movies

Attention Nation of Cowards!

I can't do anything to make you get over your snivelling refusal to deal with race relations in this horrific country of ours, but I can point out that the lovely and talented Jennifer Love Hewitt hits the bit 3-0 today.

Eighties Retro Brunette Reunion

brings you Cindy Crawford, who is 43 today:

Flixster - Share Movies

James Tiberius if a boy and Jaimie Tyronica if a girl

because Mrs. LMC will not let me name a girl after Sarah Palin.

Yips! from Robbo: Yes, indeedy! Not to put any pressure on the LMC or anything, but I may say that there is a certain hope at Orgle Manor a) that it will be a James Tiberius and b) that Robbo - now that he's Vatican-Approved - can wangle a Godfather role of some sort. I'm up to my ears in daughters, nieces and God-daughters and it would be nice to restore the balance just a bit.

"Free Beer for My Horses" and "Give Me Liberty or at Least A Big Screen TV"

and other good pics from the rally against The One's stimulus. Via Michelle Malkin.

I think Rush nailed it: if you really want to send the libs over the edge, laugh at them. They really have no idea how to handle it.

It is not necessarily porn just because it is two gals kissing . . .

Megyn Kelly takes on the latest PETA ad on Fox:

Via Hot Air.

Schmokin' Gals Over Forty

Say hello to Salma Hayek, age 42:

Flixster - Share Movies

Benedict Reminds Madame Speaker About Life

This is Hot Air's take on it.

Double-Plus Goodiness

I'm going to be out of town on bidness for a couple days, so I pass along these two items now:

1. Russ from Winterset passes along a note reminding me that tomorrow is Molly Ringwald's birthday. Now I'll probably get pelted with rocks and garbage for this, but I have never been much of a fan of Mizz Ringwald. Nonetheless, we got testosterone to spare 'round here and I'm sure the LMC and Gary will be all over this. (Right, guys?)

2. You want unicorns? We got unicorns (AND rainbows)! Go on over and check it out. Yips! to Mink Monica for dropping the link in the Tasty-Bits (TM) Mail Sack.

We've Still Got It Going On

We're the No. 1 google hit for Llamas Out Of Control.

Yeah, baybee!

Too Irresistable To Pass Up

"I did not have sexual relations with that economy, Miss Catastrophe!"

Happy Belated Valentine's Day

The Llama Emeritus sent this little bit o' smoochy and I felt it only right to share teh luv with you lot:

When in Doubt, Always Bet on Red

Today is Rene Russo's day, still shmokin!:

Flixster - Share Movies

Gratuitous Presidents' Day Posting

I have long felt abandonment of the celebrations of Washington's and Lincoln's birthdays and their replacement by a generic "Presidents' Day" to be thoroughly ridiculous. On the one hand, I have no particular desire to celebrate the office as such: the President is just a public servant. An important one, granted, but I see no more use in a special holiday for him than I do in, say, the annual abomination now known as "Administrative Assistants' Day."

On the other hand, if you're talking about celebrating the individuals who have actually held this position throughout the country's history, then no distinction whatever is made between, on the one hand, the likes of Washington, Lincoln and Reagan, and on the other, such jokers as Andrew Johnson, Jimmah Carter and Bubba Clinton. To quote The Incredibles:

Helen Parr: "Everybody's special, Dash."

Dash: "Which is another way of saying no one is."

Feh.

No, this Presidents' Day, I instead give you a different Carter to praise:

Give her a special day and I'd be right there with you.

Pirates of the Mediterranean

On this day in 1804, young Lt. Stephen Decatur Jr. and a small band of volunteers boarded the frigate U.S.S. Philadelphia, run aground on a reef in Tripoli Harbor, and burned her lest she should fall into the hands of the Barbary pirates.

If piracy isn't the world's oldest profession, it easily has to be within the top five. The troubles off the Golden Horn of Africa these days are certainly nothing new, as today's anniversary should remind us.

For an interesting take on the geo-political issues of Mediterranean piracy confronting a young United States under President Jefferson and the means by which he sought to deal with them, may I recommend The Pirate Coast by Richard Zacks. Among other things he deals with the whole Philadelphia incident, including asserting that the ship could have been heaved off the reef when she first ran aground and saved, but that Captain Bainbridge (who later commanded the Constitution in her epic battle against HMS Java) chickened out. Zacks contends that Bainbridge's cowardice was hushed up by powerful friends back home in order to save his naval career.

The Census

Bill Sammon on yesterday's Fox News Sunday pointed out that the plan to move supervision of the Census Bureau to the White House Chief of Staff was the equivalent of putting the Democratic version of Karl Rove in charge of it. Yet no outrage from the MSM . . .

This damn song is bouncing around my noggin:

Mrs. LMC bought a card which plays this tune when opened. Why couldn't she have picked a card with something by Cyndi Lauper or Pat Benatar instead of a one-hit wonder doing a remake of a classic?

Pop Quiz: Why Did Meg Get Lots of Dates Back in the Day?

Hint: check out these screen captures from The Big Chill. Today is her day so say: "Happy Birthday:"

Flixster - Share Movies

Phi Beta Cons

at NRO have a piece on speech codes in the LA community college system. It reminds me of a gem, the Confidential Review Committee, at my alma mater during my first year of law school twenty years ago. The CRC was composed of representatives of every conceivable group that might have an axe to grind with a Southern good 'ole boy and its jurisidiction included matters of sexual propriety, harassment, and even attack. I was appalled that amateurs were taking it upon themselves to pass judgment on alleged criminal behavior--functions that society assigns to the police, the local commonwealth's attorney, and the courts. Thankfully, the school quietly abandoned this exercise in Star Chamber justice.

A Man For All Seasons

Judd Gregg tells The One to pound sand. Via Drudge. My gut instinct is the move to put the Census Bureau under Rahm Emanuel's effective control is what did it. The Dems will wait a little while and see if Gregg gets anything more than overnight play. If he does, rumors will be planted of "problems" during vetting.

20/20 Hindsight Just Gives You A Clearer View Of Your Own Ass

Aw, Jeez -

WASHINGTON (AFP) – Two-thirds of Americans favor investigating whether the George W. Bush administration overstepped legal boundaries in its "war on terror," according to a poll released Thursday by USA Today and Gallup.

A majority of respondents said a probe should be launched into allegations that the Bush team used torture to interrogate terror suspects.

Investigators also should look into the former president's program of wiretapping US citizens without first securing court-issued warrants, respondents said.

About four respondents in 10 polled by USA Today (38 percent) favored criminal investigations, while about a quarter (24 percent) said they want an investigation without criminal charges being filed.

Some one-third of those polled (34 percent) said they want nothing done at all, the pollsters said.

Love the quotation-mark treatment of war on terror. You know, because the Bushies were off in their own little demented make-believe land waging it.

I tell you truly that the following is going to happen:

1.) There's going to be another big attack some time soon.

2.) In its aftermath, the survivors are going to be howling that the Bush Administration didn't do enough to stop it.

You mark my words.

Why Can't We Be Friends?

Jennifer Aniston hits the big 4-0 today.

From the soopermarket line tabloid headlines I know that she seems to have been relegated to the role of the psychotic ex in the whole Brangelina thing, and I don't have much to say about her career one way or the other, but I'm gonna throw down here and say that I've always thought her mighty easy on the eyes.

We Are Not Worthy!

Bow down, ye mortals, before the awesome power that is the PETA public relations department!

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals knows how to grab attention. And show off its laundry.

The animal rights group, which every year stages a protest at the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show, had two of its members dress in Ku Klux Klan garb outside Madison Square Garden on Monday.

Their goal, according to a post on the PETA website, was to draw a parallel between the KKK and the American Kennel Club. "Obviously it's an uncomfortable comparison," PETA spokesman Michael McGraw told the Associated Press.

But the AKC is trying to create a "master race" when it comes to pure-bred dogs, he added. "It's a very apt comparison."

The group passed out brochures implying the Klan and AKC have the goal of "pure bloodlines" in common.

And the result? Stupid hippies dressed as klansmen!

I met a traveller from a meat-free land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of soy
Stand in the desert. Near them on the sand,
Half sunk, some shatter'd sea-kittens lie, whose frown
And wrinkled lips and fins of cold command
Tell that its sculptor well those vegan passions read
Which yet survive, stamp'd on these free-range things,
The hand that mink'd them and the heart that veggie-fed.
And on the pedestal these words appear:
"My name is Petamandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Carnivores, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains: round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare,
The lone and level Kentucky-fried cruelty stretchs far away.

Future National Holiday

Today Sarah Palin is 45. Here is The 'Cuda back at the convention:

and here is the linky to SarahPAC so that you may do her homage as well.

Stimulating Rhetoric

May I humbly request that the next time The One, Nancy Pelooooozie or Light-Arse Harry Reid start in damning "those who would do nothing" in the face of the economic meltdown, they actually favor us by naming names? You know, as in actually identifying those who want the guv'mint to do, literally, nothing?

So far as I can see, no serious voices - including those firmly opposed to the 900 lb stimulus gorilla making its way through Congress - are advocating that Uncle simply sit on his hands. The debate, rayther, is over what kind of action would provide the best effect.

This "You're either with us or you're with the forces of economic China Syndrome" blather is beginning to get on my nerves something fierce.

We're Doomed Yips! from Gary:

Egads!

Ka-Ching

"Are We Having Stimulus Yet?"

As Zippy the Pinhead might say:

"$9.7 Trillion Unicorns!

$9.7 Trillion Unicorns!!

$9.7 Trillion Unicorns!!!"

Obligatory Dollhouse trailer

Peddling the latest from Robbo's fellow alum at the People's Glorious Soviet of Middletown:

"He's Just Not That Into You" - The Dissenting Review - UPDATED With Guy Reasserter Commentary!

OK, so I happen to get dragged to a Friday matinee "chick flick" as an early Valentine to the Mrs. and guess what? I actually like it.

Now "Rotten Tomatoes" gives it a collective 44% fresh from its aggregated reviews. And John Nolte (aka "Dirty Harry") at Big Hollywood isn't impressed either. Sure it's not a classic romantic comedy in any respect, but it wasn't preachy, it wasn't sappy and it wasn't all that unrealistic. In fact, despite Nolte's lament that the film seems to portray women as "doormats" I think we should keep in mind that this is kind of the point of the story: real women often put up with unbelievable crap from men because they invent endless rationalizations that it's because either they are at fault or that they're reading the signals wrong.

It's sad, but it's true (and it happens to men sometimes too).

Continue with minor spoilers below the fold.

Like the perennial Christmas movie that I am forced to endure every yuletide, "Love, Actually", "He's Just Not That Into You" follows several stories of women (who are peripherally connected) as they fall into the all-too-familiar traps of fooling themselves into believing things that are not so.

There's the young, hot woman who falls for a married man and is convinced he'll leave his wife for her. The wife whose husband cheats and is convinced that she drove him to it. The gal who lives with a guy forever and never comes around to popping the question (and never will). And there's the serial dater who is always open to the idea that the next man she's set up with will be "the one" (as opposed to "The One", who is our current President).

The stories have each of these women confront the reality that the excuses they make for men (which their friends are often complicit with) are just that. The men aren't portrayed as horrible. Thoughtless, careless and insensitive at times but very human. And often they redeem themselves (though you can probably guess that the cheating married guy situation doesn't end well - they almost never do).

And just when they story gets you comfortable with a storyline that confirms the cynicism that makes these women appear to be fools, it suckers you into realizing that holding back, playing it safe and not taking any risk usually leads you ending up sad and alone. Of course, you can easily end up that way by putting yourself out there, too. But it's almost guaranteed when you don't.

Unlike a lot of the reviewers, I did find it funny. And most of all I found it to be an entertaining experience that I could share with my own Valentine.

So here's a dissenting point of view for those of you guys who may be thinking of avoiding this one like the plague: don't. Follow the films theme and take a chance. I think a lot of you will be pleasantly surprised.

Just my humble opinion from a fairly typical guy (if there is such a thing).

"Scotty! We Need Warp Power Testosterone In Thirty Seconds Or We're All Dead" Yips! From Robbo: This weekend the Missus asked me if I'd like to watch a DVD of "P.S. I Love You" with her. I scoffed.

Very Not Bad

Last night's stay-at-home night featured Eagle Eye with Michelle Monaghan:

Michelle Monaghan celebrity profile

and the always impressive Rosario Dawson:

Flixster - Share Movies

You Called Down the Thunder, Now You've Got It!

BSG last night: Adama, back in the saddle. Roslin, on her game. The Quorum, now the departed. Felix and the VP--SOL. Best line goes to Roslin telling Gaeta and Tom Gareth: "I'M COMING FOR YOU!"

Which reminds me of the classic scene from Tombstone:

Count on Us to Pass Along the Really Important Questions

Such as: "Are Reality Shows Too Tough On Skanks?" Via Hot Air and The Onion--NSFW:

In Vino Veritas

After Robbo went one over the eight watching the Super Bowl last Sunday, the Missus demanded that I give my feet a rest by climbing up on the ol' wagon.

I'd been planning to give up wine for Lent anyway (as is my usual custom - or attempted custom), but the sudden acceleration of the cut-off date caught me unprepared. I'm used to a glass or two every evening, and without them my sleep cycle has been all off: where I should be in deep sleep, I'm in light sleep; and where I should be in light sleep, I'm awake. The result is that I've become increasingly zombie-like as the week has progressed.

I say all this not to bore you with my problems, nor to solicit gratuitous commentary about creeping alchoholism, but rayther in order that I may post a tune that's been running through my head all week:

Well, I'm screwed

I started a new job working as in-house counsel for a bank this week but had no idea I would joining the world's newest despised profession. A local mayor was having his annual "State of the City" address to assembled business leaders and I was drafted to attend in place of one of the corporate officers. A street preacher outside the event held a sign which all but called down hellfire and damnation on evil bankers while the preacher called out to all in earshot that bankers are worse than prostitutes. I asked one of the loan guys if I was a banker, since I don't make loans. He responded in the affirmative, cementing my place with the damned.

Disaster Looms From Giant Intergalactic Mutant Vampire Bats and Messianic Hopey and Changey, But Mostly From Messianic Hopey and Changey

(Title format lifted shamelessly from Ace.)

Your Saturday reading: Steyn on the Obamessiah -

So how’s that going? Jesus took a handful of loaves and two fish and fed 5,000 people. Barack wants to take a trillion pieces of pork and feed it to a handful of Democratic-party interest groups. Jesus picked twelve disciples. Barack seems to have gone more for one of those Dirty Dozen, caper-movie line-ups, where the mission is so perilous and so audacious that only the scuzziest lowlifes recruited from every waterfront dive have any chance of pulling it off. The ends justify the mean SOBs: “Indispensable” Tim Geithner, wanted in twelve jurisdictions for claiming his kid’s summer camp as a business expense, is the only guy with the savvy to crack the code of the U.S. economy. Tom “Home, James!” Daschle is the ruthless backseat driver who can figure out how to steer the rusting gurney of U.S. health care through the corridors of power. Charles Bronson is the hardbitten psycho ex-con who can’t go straight but knows how to turn around the Department of the Interior.

And, of course, there’s the lovable dough-faced shnook in the front office, Robert “Fall Guy” Gibbs. He didn’t do nuthin’ wrong, but, when seven nominees die in a grisly shootout with a Taxable Benefit Swat Team in the alley behind the Senate, he makes the mistake of looking sweaty and shifty while answering routine questions.

A president doesn’t have to be able to walk on water. But he does have to choose the right crew for the ship, especially if he’s planning on spending most of his time at the captain’s table schmoozing the celebrity guests with a lot of deep thoughts about “hope” and “change.” Far worse than his cabinet picks was President Obama’s decision to make the “stimulus” racket the all-but-sole priority of his first month, and then outsource the project to Nancy Pelosi, Barney Frank, and Harry Reid. Appearing on The Rush Limbaugh Show last week, I got a little muddled over two adjoining newspaper clippings—one on the stimulus, the other on those octuplets in California—and for a brief moment the two stories converged. Everyone’s hammering that mom—she’s divorced, unemployed, living in a small house with parents who have a million bucks’ worth of debt, and she’s already got six kids. So she has in vitro fertilization to have eight more. But isn’t that exactly what the Feds have done? Last fall, they gave birth to an $850 billion bailout they couldn’t afford and didn’t have enough time to keep an eye on, and now four months later they’re going to do it all over again, but this time they want trillionuplets. Barney and Nancy represent the in vitro fertilization of the federal budget. And it’s the taxpayers who’ll get stuck with the diapers.

Those supporters who were wary of touting Obama as the walk-on-water Messiah did their best to lower expectations by hailing him merely as the new FDR. You remember the old FDR—“We have nothing to fear but fear itself.” Ha! With the new New Deal, we have everything to fear. As President Obama warned on Tuesday, “A failure to act, and act now, will turn crisis into a catastrophe.” If you’re of those moonstruck Obammysoxers still driving around with the “HOPE, NOT FEAR” bumper stickers, please note that, due to an unfortunate proofreading error at the printing plant, certain nouns in that phrase may have been accidentally transposed.

As it happens, the best way to ensure catastrophe is to “act now.” It would be nice if the world could all prance along in regimented unison like the Radio City Changettes. But, alas, the foreigners made the mistake of actually reading the “stimulus” bill, and the protectionist measures buried on page 739 sub-section XII(d) ended, instantly, the Obama honeymoon overseas. The European Union has threatened a trade war. Up in Canada, provincial premiers called it “a march to insanity.” Wait a minute: I thought the Obama era was meant to be the retreat from insanity, a blessed return to multilateral transnational harmony?

As longtime readers will know, I’m all in favor of flipping the bird to the global community. But at least, when Rummy was doing his shtick about “Old Europe,” he did it intentionally. To cheese off the foreigners entirely by accident before you’ve even had your first black-tie banquet is quite an accomplishment. Protectionism is serious business to the Continentals. Oh, to be sure, if the swaggering unilateralist Yank cowboy invades some Third World basket-case they’ll seize on it as an opportunity for some cheap moral posturing. But in the end they don’t much care one way or the other. Plunging the planet into global depression, on the other hand, is an entirely different matter.

Go read the rest. And start stockpiling non-perishable food items and burying the family silver out back.

Gratuitous Nats Posting

With a week to go until pitchers and catchers report, is my team - which lost 102 games last year - on track to pick up right about where they left off? That seems to be the buzz:

The Washington Nationals missed a golden opportunity on the free agent market - they let Eddie Guardado get away.

Guardado is the Texas Rangers reliever who nearly had a heart attack last season when his team played a trick on him: They told him he had been traded to the Nationals.

And there he was in the off-season, on the free agent market, ready to be had. But the Rangers signed Guardado to a minor league deal Tuesday.

Signing Guardado would have been nice comic relief for the Nationals, who might as well roll with their reputation as the laughingstocks of baseball.

Here it is, a week before pitchers and catchers report to spring training, and the Nationals essentially have the same team that finished with 102 losses last year. The only notable changes are the addition of three average-at-best players: pitchers Scott Olsen and Daniel Cabrera and outfielder Josh Willingham.

Sorry, I forgot: They recently signed two free agents, shortstop Alex Cintron and catcher Javier Valentin, to minor league contracts. (With this club, I'm not sure how that differs from a major league contract.)

Valentin is another former Cincinnati Reds player - former Reds and current Nationals general manager Jim Bowden seems intent on running a welfare hotel for Cincinnati rejects and refugees.

Sigh.

Well, "dum spiro, spero," I suppose. I, for one, refuse to give up on the team and look forward with keen anticipation to mid-April.

I may add that the eldest Llama-ette is also looking forward to the season with a Khan-like sense of vengeance: Technically, the Phillies did not have to push us past the 100 loss mark in order to clench the division last season and she's convinced they did so simply to humiliate us. Therefore, no matter what else happens this year, her motto is simple: Philadelphia Delenda Est.

Heck, I can go along with that.

Say WHAT?

From NRO:

From The Hill:

How money is spent should be far from the biggest concern about the stimulus package, its chief author, House Appropriations Committee Chairman David Obey (D - Wisc.) said Friday. "So what?" Obey asked in response to a question on NPR's "Morning Edition" about the perceived lack of direction from Congress as to how money in the stimulus should be spent. "This is an emergency. We've got to simply find a way to get this done as fast as possible and as well as possible, and that's what we're doing."

Well, hokaaaay then. Please make the check payable to "cash". Remember to stick a lot of zeroes on the end of the dollar amount, and send it along to:

Robbo T. Llama
c/o Llama Central
221B Baker Street
Idunno, AK

Thankee in advance for your support!

Happy Birthday, Mr. President!

Dutch Reagan, born this day in 1911 in Tampico, Illinois. Last fall, I happened to drive through that part of the Illinois prairie. And taking a good look at the rolling cornfields, seeing the farmsteads way off in the distance and the skyline stretching out forever, stopping and talking with the local folks (or rayther, being talked to death by the local folks, who are the most gregarious pack of people I have ever met), I couldn't help being reminded again of Reagan's intense Midwesternesse, which trait was, I think, one of the cornerstones of his success.

It's waaaaay early, of course, but judging by recent events, I'm beginning to wonder if the unicorn I'm going to get isn't, in fact, the Gipper's true heir.

Khaaaaanissimo!

Your Friday morning no-hot-beverages funny:

Know why this works? 'Cos Khan really is a space opera. Never mind that, tho, just enjoy.

Yips! to the Llama Emeritus. (Yes, him!)

Tapper v. Gibbs--White House Pressroom Gold

Via Allahpundit over at Hot Air.

Your Moron Headline For The Day

Frigid Temperatures Take [Western New York] By Surprise.

It's freakin' Buffalo, New York! It's freakin' early February!! This is a surprise?

And of course, it's another own goal for the Global Warming Doomsday crowd:

Buffalo State College hosts the national teach-in on Global Warming Situations today — a day the local temperature bottomed out at minus 6 degrees.

Exactly which Braniacs decided to schedule such a "national teach-in" on this day in this of all places, anyway?

A pack of stupid undergrad pot-smoking beatniks, would be my guess. (Dudes! Try having your "teach-in" somewhere in the Southwest in August! Less chance of, like, snow n' ice n' stuff.)

These people can't even take care of themselves, evidently. Why in Heaven's name should anyone entrust them with the future of the planet?

Continuing with the theme

of the gracefully aging, say "hello" to Jennifer Jason Leigh who mother did such a fine job 47 years ago today:

Flixster - Share Movies

Looks like no sneak blogging from the new office

The new place has a Barracuda firewall/internet filter. The most controversial thing I can see is the Drudge Report.

GoDaddy.com Super Bowl Ad

because there is nothing wrong with a fetching brunette taking her fifth shower of the day:

Well, hello Danica.

Separated At Birth?

Is it just me or does the former-soon-to-be Head of HHS

bear a striking similarity of appearance to the former-soon-to-be King of Late Night:

The world wonders.

Seventies Retro Reunion

Morgan Fairchild, back in the day, because today is her day:

Flixster - Share Movies

YIPS! From Robbo:

Not so far back in the day, neither. That pic is from Fairchild's 2005 stage tour as Mrs. Robinson in The Graduate. I remember seeing similar photos in the WaPo when the show came to town and thinking "Dayum".

Here's a money quote from one of the reviews of the production (emphasis added):

A warning for audiences attending "The Graduate" this week: There's nudity in a key scene, but don't expect to see a whole lot, says the play's star, Morgan Fairchild.

She takes on the classic role of Mrs. Robinson in the touring company of the play, which is part of the Broadway Las Vegas series, in performance today through Sunday at Cashman Theatre.

Fairchild doffs her towel in a key scene, which is lighted with discretion, according to the actress who has appeared in a host of TV shows, including "Flamingo Road" and "Cybill."

"All of us who've done the part have had some trepidation" about the nude scene, Fairchild said in a recent interview while on the road. "It is discreetly lighted, and I cling to that, that the audience doesn't see much."

Not that Fairchild has let herself go.

She says the tour's opening night audience of college students responded favorably when the towel dropped.

I'll bet they did.

Shamelessly swiped

The Victoria's Secret ad from the Super Bowl:

Fixy-Thingy Yips! from Gary:
OK, got that little clip compatible with the HTML nomenclature.

BTW, I'd guess that the subtle message here to you guys is..."Hey, it's only a game. Don't you go gettin' whiskey d@$%! I'm waiting in the bedroom. Wink, wink."

And did anyone else know that there's a NEW ONE-HOUR episode of "The Office" following "the Big Game"?

Superbowl Prediction...

Tonight's game will rank as the 3rd or 4th least watched in 43 years.

Wake me up when it's over.

On second thought, nah.

Transitions-light posting warning

I will busy finishing my old job and starting a new one over the next few days as I close out my time in private practice and move to a new job as in-house counsel for one of our clients. Better pay, better benefits, better hours, and without the constant pressure to generate business.

BSG random thoughts

1. Glad to see President Roslin dressed, back in the saddle, with her hair, and not feeling sorry for herself;
2. Starbuck is nuts but exaqctly the gal you want backing you up in a bar fight;
3. Adama is once again as tough as they come;
4. Felix is a worm.