October 20, 2009

The Tidy Bowl Follies

Man stabs son over clogged toilet.

I'm not saying I approve of this fellah's behavior, necessarily, but at the same time I'm not completely unsympathetic either.

Once we got clear of the diaper stage with the Llama-ettes, I believed that I was finally free of a thoroughly disgusting business.

What a fool I was.

I still don't completely understand what it is they do in there, but I would estimate that I am called upon to unclog the potties at Orgle Manor at least a couple times a week, a task that gives me the screaming heebie-jeebies.

Mrs. Robbo, rushing to the gels' defense, claims that there's a defect in the plumbing, but this is nonsense: In all my time here, I have never once caused a jam myself.

I lecture the gels. I plead with them. I berate them. I even offer tutorials on proper flushing technique. And yet, all to little avail. It is still quite common that after a long day at the office and a beastly commute home, I walk in the door to the cry of "Daaaaaa-aad! The potty's jammed again!"

Whereupon I turn green and start swelling out of my clothes. HULK! PLUNGE!!!

Posted by Robert at October 20, 2009 11:54 AM | TrackBack

A plunger is a very simple tool. One kids can be taught to use.

Posted by: Mike at October 20, 2009 12:07 PM

We taught our son, now 10, how to use it. The child would consistently clog the toilet!

Posted by: GroovyVic at October 20, 2009 02:17 PM

And Robbo, those tutorials on proper flushing technique don't work on my kids, either.

Posted by: GroovyVic at October 20, 2009 02:17 PM

The elder gel uses MILES of t.p. and she's only 7. She also dawdles for ages...thought that nonsense came in the teen years! And husband has the same problem at his office, which is staffed completely with females. I don't get it, but broads like yards of paper and don't take to the idea of flushing "in medias res" if necessary.

Posted by: Mink Monica at October 20, 2009 03:13 PM

being a guy, I don't understand why women need yards of t.p.. Brought it up exactly once, early in my marriage - to no avail...

Posted by: kmr at October 20, 2009 04:54 PM

Our Little Debutante goes through TP at a prodigous rate. One can only wonder what the burn rate with be with TWO gels in the house, plus the missus. . .

Posted by: LMC at October 20, 2009 06:29 PM

I think I have an idea for a Sheryl Crow kiddie album. . .

Posted by: rbj at October 20, 2009 06:49 PM

We were lucky, The Lad caught on quickly.

I'm still trying to wrap my mind around how much it bothers you. Why not just have one of the servants do it. And be glad your wive didn't suffere frmom Hyperemesis gravidarium.

Posted by: Boy Named Sous at October 20, 2009 09:57 PM

BNS - Just can't get good help these days.

Posted by: Robbo the LB at October 21, 2009 03:36 PM

Frequent toilet clogging here in one bathroom especially. I think it is due to a combination of a slightly less than desirable angle to the pipe and to the excessive use of toilet paper. But the worse problem around here is drumming it into the kiddos that they MUST. FLUSH. THE. &#(@^!!!. TOILET.

Posted by: Jordana at October 21, 2009 04:00 PM

Right there with you. Their usual response? "We're afraid to because it'll clog!"


"Mr. McGee, don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

Posted by: Robbo the LB at October 21, 2009 04:45 PM
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