August 11, 2009

Etiquette Question For The Group

"What is the appropriate response to meeting the new squeeze of a friend who recently separated from a long-time spouse?" There is a noticeable trend among our acquaintances around here that suddenly hubby decides his wife/mother of his children is not cutting it/he never loved her, etc. and they feel the need to take up with a bartender in a country-western place, singer in his garage band, etc.

Posted by LMC at August 11, 2009 06:12 AM | TrackBack

I've always found that nice, mature, and polite is the best way to go.

And then you mentally size them up and go back and gossip with your wife later.

Posted by: GroovyVic at August 11, 2009 06:17 AM

Is "homewrecker" out of fashion these days?

Posted by: rbj at August 11, 2009 07:27 AM

rbj - It shouldn't be, though it sounds as if the fault may be more the mans - you can lead a horse to water and all that.

I'm generally polite, but do drop a few references to shared experiences with the exwife, as a way of putting the new honey on notice that she has to earn her place.

Posted by: Diane at August 11, 2009 07:41 AM

"How do you do" never goes out of style. And always remember there are two sides to EVERY story. I'm with Vicky, keep the snark to may be asked to the new couple's kid's godfather.

Posted by: Mink Monica at August 11, 2009 10:12 AM

It's even more fun when the man in question has moved into your spare bedroom. At least he finally saw the light and went back home.

Posted by: Captain Ned at August 11, 2009 10:35 AM

I'd tell him there was no reason to take out his inferiority complex (yes, about THAT) on his wife. In front of the new girlfriend. But that's just me. You might choose to do differently.

Vic's right: polite works wonders. THEN you can go home and be snarky.

Posted by: Kathy at August 11, 2009 01:27 PM

I love the assumption that if there's divorce happening, it must be because the husband is some sort of selfish jerk who simply wants to upgrade to a newer model, NOT because just maybe there's more going on in the relationship thatn YOU know about. Having said that, how you respond would depend a lot on how long the man's been separated, id the divorce is final/pending/even filed yet, how and when he met the "new squeeze", and what the ex/wife is up to herself these days.

Posted by: Boy Named Sous at August 13, 2009 06:31 PM

I guess "So you're the whore" might not be appropriate.

(I'm joking, of course.)

Posted by: The Abbot at August 15, 2009 07:19 AM