Carbon footprint blather

Mrs. LMC persuaded yours truly to attend an alumnae function this evening for the retiring president of her alma mater, a certain woman's college in central Virginia. The reception was held at the swanky digs of a local well-to-alum with luxury cars/SUVs lining the street on both sides going up to the walk. The guest of honor held forth in the front hall of this abode at some length about new programs at the school, "energy audits" of the academic buildings, and a commitment to be "carbon neutral." I wondered aloud to the knuckle-draggers huddled in the back if the gal had any idea what an "energy audit" would reveal about her present setting, from the gas fireplaces to the twelve-foot ceilings to the underwater lights in the outdoor pool that would not see swimmers before next May. I was further tempted to asked the old gal if she might look out the window and call back the make and model of each vehicle parked outside before going on and on about "carbon neutrality." Instead, I headed back to the bar for another round. No question about it, when the revolution comes, I will be the first one up against the wall.