November 16, 2008

AUIEG** Diary - Day 12

Still no sign.

Diary, I feel I need to apologize for yesterday's outburst. You see, I was kind of upset. Also, I was looking on those who I thought were hurling insults at Dreamy B as, well, sinful. Perhaps, fallen. Certainly not in that state of grace in which I felt it appropriate to pay them the least bit of attention.

Well you know what, Diary? The One moves in mysterious ways.

You see, this morning I happened to glance at the op-ed section of Pravda on the Potomac. The lede opinion was by Eliot Spitzer - Sooper Donk - and was entitled 'How To Ground the Street.' It was all about the baaaad things Wall Street had done to get us into this soon-to-be-Great-Depression-mess, and the steps we must take Right Now in order to prevent such a heinous calamity.

So why was this relevent to my way of thinking? Well, gosh, Diary, it wasn't all that long ago that I remember Eliot Spitzer, then Governor of New York, being nailed for having purchased the services of high-priced whores. As you'll recall, dear Diary, Spitzer resigned from his position over the flap when his, ah, extra-marital shopping became known.

Now, gosh! Call me naive and simple-minded, but when a scumbag of this sort gets caught and exposed for the hedonistic megalomaniac that he is, I'd have thought that was the last we'd ever hear of him. And yet here he is, writing columns about what you and I ought to in order to keep our way of life - splashed right on Page 1 of the WaPo editorials!

What does that tell you, Diary? Me, it says: "The One will absolve you of all sins -past, present and future!" Mayun is that comforting! Till now, I'll admit, Diary, that this whole Catholic-guit thing has really held me back. However, now that I see a clear road in front of me, I reckon that Dreamy B and I will be able to raise hell like a couple sailors on shore-leave and no questions asked!

How sweet is that?

Oooooh, I can't wait for The One to send Dreamy B to me!

Yours,

Robbo

(**A Unicorn In Every Garage)

UPDATE: Dear Diary - The Wall Street Journal must read you because they stole my idea!

Posted by Robert at November 16, 2008 10:50 PM | TrackBack
Comments

I must apologize too. I have been so much blinded by the paternalistic white man's value system that I could not think of, let alone celebrate unicorns of differing abilities. But once The One takes His oath of office we will all be able to honor wing-enabled unicorns as well as the wing challenged ones. Maybe we'll have a great big party at the national lollipop tree.

Perhaps Dear Leader can make William Ayers Secretary of Education so we can smash the right-wing education system of this country that doesn't allow us to accept all different sorts of unicorns.

Posted by: rbj at November 17, 2008 01:33 PM

Hey, Robbo, whatever you and Dreamy B consent to do together in private is your business. I know that you can rent a sailor outfit for yourself, and what with all the forthcoming unicorns I'm sure you'll be able to find a sailor outfit for Dreamy B too.

Posted by: Lynellen at November 19, 2008 08:27 PM