March 22, 2007

You know, I get the sneaking suspicion he's not going to like the final product

The TV Whore over at Pajiba on some crapfest new tee-vee show:

0:00: It’s the summer of 1997 and we open on a shot of Kurt Cobain. Is this a hint to the viewers that they’re ultimately going to want to kill themselves rather than watch this show?

0:01: “Goodbye sex, huh? It’s always the best kind.” What? No it’s not! Here’s my list of the top five types of sex — feel free to debate this in the comments: 1) post-break-up sex; 2) make-up sex; 3) sex with the TV Whore; 4) angry sex; and 5) welcome home sex. Goodbye sex doesn’t make the cut at all, ‘cause it’s just too sad and weepy.

0:03: Hugs and kisses goodbye as the kid is getting ready to leave on a six-week road trip and so, obviously, cue the tambourines of Boston’s “Don’t Look Back.” This is doubly clever, by the by — the song itself applies to the situation and it’s by Boston, and he’s in a Boston suburb. But the best part of this is totally that his friends are playing air band to the song, though I’m not sure how they’re actually hearing the soundtrack. Amazing.

0:04: Ten years later, and he’s living in NYC and, son of a bitch, a second shot of Kurt Cobain. OK, seriously ABC, we get it. “October Road” is to viewers as shotgun is to Cobain.

Here’s the deal: This dude hasn’t been home in 10 years, but there’s a one-day intensive writing seminar in his hometown, which is obviously how we’re going to get him back. He’s getting this invite rather last-minute because John Irving dropped out. So let me get this straight. This kid wrote one book over the course of 10 years, he’s suffering total writer’s block on his second book, and he’s second only to John Irving? I wish they’d post this magnificent piece of literature on ABC’s website.

How can the remaining two hours top those four minutes? Click on over to find out.

Posted by Steve-O at March 22, 2007 06:42 PM | TrackBack