July 05, 2006

Movie News

For some reason I'm all about movies today . . .

To start things off, I want to bitch a little about first-run theaters. All of the first-run movie theaters closest to me are malodorous run-down hell-holes and some are in sketchy neighborhoods. The dollar movie is a palace by comparison if only because it's newer and they serve pizza. But even if I drive 50 miles to a town with "wine markets," and pay full price, the 70 mm copy they show is likely to be scratched less than a week after it opens. I hate watching a scratched movie. Add the usual annoyances of sitting in the dark with uncouth strangers and you have the manual diagramming my reasons for avoiding first-run movies.

But the new Pirates movie opens this week and soon after that we'll have Snakes on a Plane. What will I do?

A little confession is in order. Until I saw the TV ad for Snakes on a Plane over the weekend, I didn't believe it was real. I suppose I was afraid to believe in it too strongly for fear of a heart crushing disapppointment. You know the kind - when you're in the 3rd grade and your friend tells you that Davy Jones is her uncle and she is going to bring him to school on Friday so you can go for a ride in his dunebuggy with him? We've all had that dream and we've all cried bitter tears into the Naugahyde of the school bus seat when Davy didn't show up. ok - maybe that was just me, but I bet you were scared to believe in Snakes on a Plane too!

But enough of my psychiatric history, I just heard today that Keith Richards will play Jack Sparrow's father in the next Pirates film. Great tar barrels of bubbling fun! I can't wait!!!

But I still don't know what to do about Snakes. Should I be all British with the stiff upper lip and dive into a scratched and possibly flatulent first-run experience? Or should I go white-trash and wait for the dollar movie run?

*Update: I've decided Colossus has it right - Snakes is a cultural event that must be shared with fellow rubber-snake flinging, screaming, farting, pop-corn stinking, jolly, adorable humans. I'm in!

And Russ has a great point too - we need to get started compiling the props list for Snakes!

Posted by Chai-Rista at July 5, 2006 04:05 PM | TrackBack
Comments

By all means, go white trash. Mrs. LMC and I rarely frequent the movies because of the costs associated with having a sitter for the Future ROTC Scholarship Recipient and his younger sister together with dinner, tickets, and munchies turn a night at the flicks into a $100 evening. When we do go, it is to the local beer cinema where the ticket costs are low, the food is reasonably priced, and the beer is cheap.

Posted by: LMC at July 5, 2006 04:42 PM

Well, I'd agree with LMC if Snakes were just a movie.

But it's not. It's going to be a life-changing cultural event. Years from now, people will ask "Where were you when Snakes came out?" and then you will, indeed, cry bitter tears if you missed it.

Posted by: The Colossus at July 5, 2006 05:31 PM

I must agree with the Colossus here. SoaP is a cinematic event where audience participation is an integral part of the experience. I'll be at the theatre for this one, and I am generally not at all big on sharing in the audience response.

Posted by: utron at July 5, 2006 05:48 PM

Go White Trash Chai! Believe me I most certainly will be if I decide that I can handle anything with snakes in it....

Posted by: gg at July 5, 2006 06:33 PM

It's Snakes. and they're On A Plane!
Do it both ways.

Posted by: rbj at July 6, 2006 08:03 AM

We've got muth##$%#(@! SNAKES on the plane!

Posted by: Steve the LLamabutcher at July 6, 2006 12:20 PM

Snakes on a Plane? What's it about?

Posted by: Cautiously Pessimistic at July 6, 2006 12:21 PM

Shouldn't someone start putting together a list of props that moviegoers should bring in with them, or will the standard "Rocky Horror" prop pack work for all audience-participation films?

Posted by: Russ from Winterset at July 7, 2006 10:20 AM