April 22, 2008

Going Green

I just thought that our lloyal llama readers would like to know that, in honor of Earth Day, so far today I have a) not cut down the mightiest tree in the forest (with or without a herring); b) kept my slaughter of whales to an even dozen instead of my more usual baker's dozen; and c) refrained from jetting all over the world to scold people about jetting all over the world. Also, despite massive opposition from the family, I insisted that we turn off all the taps and spigots at Orgle Manor, which we usually leave running in order to create a pleasant "waterfall effect" all around the house. It's tough, but hey - sometimes you just have to take one for your Mother.

Furthermore, I intend to stick with these limitations all day.

I had thought of calling in this morning and saying that in order to reduce my carbon footprint, I wouldn't be coming to work. But I reckoned that the response would be that in order to save paper, I wouldn't be getting a paycheck.

UPDATE: Uh, oh! It isn't going to matter anyway. An apparent glitch in the normal rate of sunspot activity is about to throw another spanner into Earth's climate workings. But Dee Cee isn't going to sink into the Chesapeake as a result. No sir, it's going to be buried under one hundred feet of ice! We're dooooomed!

Posted by Robert at April 22, 2008 08:54 AM | TrackBack
Comments

Gee, all we're doing to mark the day is dinning on fois gras and veal.

Posted by: Mrs. Peperium at April 22, 2008 01:27 PM

No reason not to pay you since you probably get paid via direct deposit. Dude, they already save the paper with your paychecks! ;-)

I started an anti-earth day rant and lost the energy to post it. And I didn't feel like dealing with the random tree hugger troll than invariably would find my fine writing and start internet eco-terror.

Posted by: jen at April 22, 2008 03:08 PM

Oh, totally forgot. Besides the fois gras and veal, we're also having sex without birth control. More than once even....

Posted by: Mrs. Peperium at April 22, 2008 04:31 PM

On Sunday, while driving home from church, I spotted a Honda Civic with a bumper sticker that said "I love my carbon footprint"

Now, here's the question: Does the driver love his footprint because it's small (older model Civics actually get better gas mileage than many hybrids)? Or is he, as I am, looking to MAXIMIZE his footprint?

Posted by: ChrisN at April 22, 2008 06:48 PM