This One's For Steve-O

Wow. Big Daddy Drew over at Kissing Suzy Kolber has a positively flame-throwing "Guide To Being An Insufferable A--Hole S--thead F--kface Fan Of Boston-Area Sports Teams".

Follow these rules and I promise you that everyone from the nation’s remaining 44 states will want to rape you with a hammer. But hey, you’re a Boston sports fan now. You’ll be completely ignorant to your own jackassery. That’s the beauty of it. You are now just as f[**]ing annoying as a Notre Dame football fan, or a Duke basketball fan. That's right, Pats fan. That's the level you're at right now. Enjoy your world titles, you f[***]ing c[**]kh[*]g.

Go read. (That'll learn ya to make gratuitous cracks about the 'Fins, Steve-O!) NSFW, as you might gather from my edits, and the no hot beverages rule will be enforced.

Yips! to Jonathan V. Last at Galley Slaves.

YOU TALKIN' TO ME? YIPS from Steve-O: As The Dear One noted last night, "Moosie, you realize all America is rooting for the Rockies except for that little 'Red Sox Nation' thing your Dad keeps talking about, right?"

My message to Robbo on this is best stated in Lord of the Rings Logic: Dear Gandalf---No need to send the Eagles, I tried the ring on and IT.IS. AWESOME. Love, Frodo PS-- Send my best to you and your buddy Dumbledore, you old c*&^s&$#%er.

See, arrogant, disrespectful, overflowing with imminent rueage and LOVING IT. The state of Red Sawx Nation, October 2007.

FURTHER IMMINENT RUEAGE YIPS from Steve-O: More signs Francona's got the Ring: Rudy supports the Sawx.

BOSTON - Sounds like a baseball flip-flop. Rudy Giuliani, a lifelong New York Yankees fan, said Tuesday he's pulling for their most hated rivals, the Boston Red Sox, to win the World Series over the Colorado Rockies.

"I'm rooting for the Red Sox," the Republican presidential contender said in response to a question, sparking applause at the Boston restaurant where he was picking up a local endorsement.

"I'm an American League fan, and I go with the American League team, maybe with the exception of the Mets," he said. "Maybe that would be the one time I wouldn't because I'm loyal to New York."

Giuliani's Yankees lost in the first round of the playoffs, then lost their manager when Giuliani's friend, Joe Torre, refused to accept a pay cut and walked away. Giuliani said the Yankees had "a great season."

The former New York mayor said his declaration of temporary Red Sox loyalty was "not just because I'm here in Massachusetts."

"In Colorado, in the next week or two, you will see, I will have the courage to tell the people of Colorado the same thing, that I am rooting for the Red Sox in the World Series," he said.

Note to Rudy: dude, you've already sewn up my Mom's vote, what gives? Folks, I'm officially worried now that Rudy is moving in on my Moms.

Next thing you know the Fonz will come out for the Sawx and then we are officially doomed.

Yips! back from Robbo: I was cringing over what Gregg Easterbrook was going to make of the Pats humiliation of the 'Fins this weekend, but was pleasantly surprised when he used it as part of his brief in support of the argument that the Pats are Hell's Football Team and that Belichick is Satan:

Argument for the New England Patriots as scoundrels in the service of that which is baleful: Dishonesty, cheating, arrogance, hubris, endless complaining even in success. The Patriots have three Super Bowl rings, but that jewelry is tarnished by their cheating scandal. They run up the score to humiliate opponents -- more on that below -- thus mocking sportsmanship. Their coach snaps and snarls in public, seeming to feel contempt for the American public that has brought him wealth and celebrity. Victory seems to give Bill Belichick no joy, and defeat throws him into fury. Belichick and the rest of the top of the Patriots' organization continue to refuse to answer questions about what was in the cheating tapes -- and generally, you refuse to answer questions if you have something to hide. The team has three Super Bowl triumphs, yet its players regularly whine about not being revered enough. The team's star, Tom Brady, is a smirking sybarite who dates actresses and supermodels but whose public charity appearances are infrequent. That constant smirk on Brady's face reminds one of Dick Cheney; people who smirk are fairly broadcasting the message, "I'm hiding something." The Patriots seem especially creepy at this point because we still don't know whether they have told the full truth about the cheating scandal -- or even whether they really have stopped cheating. They say they have, but their word is not exactly gold at this juncture. Ladies and gentlemen, representing Evil, the New England Patriots.

Vade retro!