Another 55 Questions Meme

Pinched from CalTechGirl. I'm doing this while waiting for the Missus, the Llama-ettes and my dinner to come home (not necessarily in that order of priority), so it may be a bit strange. Shoved below the fold:

1. Is your second toe longer than your first?
No, they're roughly the same. Is this an issue?

2. Do you have a favorite type of pen?
Do people still get all hepped up over Mont Blanc and Cross and the like? That all seems so 80's.

3. Look at your planner for March 14, what are you doing?
My what?

4. What color are your toenails usually?
Erm, toenail colored. Except when I drop heavy things on them, which I sometimes do.

5. What was the last thing you highlighted?
Oh, something from one of the umpteen cases I yank off of Westlaw every day, I suppose.

6. What color are your bedroom curtains?
No curtains. We have wooden blinds that are, well, wood-colored.

7. What color are the seats in your car?
Kind of a grayish, I suppose.

8. Have you ever had a black and white cat?
No, ours have always been tabbies of various hue. My brother had one, however.

9. What is the last thing you put a stamp on?
The only mail I actually put together myself these days are my Netflix returns, which are prepaid.

10. Do you know anyone who lives in Wyoming?
I'm surprised by the implication that anybody lives in Wyoming.

11. Why did you withdraw cash from the ATM the last time?
I've been married 14 years. You think I have a cash card?

12. Whose is the last baby that you held?
I can't remember, but I do recall that it was long after the Llama-ettes had passed that stage and I was panicky to remember what to do.

13. Unlucky #?
I've got problems with 33,413. Never liked it.

14. Do you like Cinnamon toothpaste?
Ew. Who comes up with these things?

15. What kind of car were you driving 2 years ago?
My Wrangler. It's an '03 that I bought new. I still have fewer than 25K miles on it.

16. Pick one: Miami Hurricanes or Florida Gators?
Don't care. The only team I like is Florida State because I like their cheer: "Whoo-Whooo-Whooo-Whooop Them Boys!"

17. Last time you went to Six Flags?
1983. And it was the original in Arlington, TX. And I know why it's called Six Flags.

18. Do you have any wallpaper in your house?
One of the first things we got rid of when we moved in.

19. Closest thing to you that is yellow?
An old nametag of one of the Llama-ettes, stuck on the bulletin board in front of me.

20. Last person to give you a business card?
I've asked Father M for one twice, but each time he claims he's just run out. Uh, huh.

21. Who is the last person you wrote a check to?
See #11 above.

22. Closest framed picture to you?
A box set of teh Llama-ettes, taken about five years ago. Tempus fugit, indeed.

23. Last time you had someone cook for you?
Weeknights I generally cook for myself, as the Missus and the Llama-ettes eat before I get home.

24. Have you ever applied for welfare?
Nope.

25. How many emails do you have?
You mean addresses? Three.

26. Last time you received flowers?
Huh?

27. Do you think the sanctity of marriage is meant for only a man & woman?
Yes.

28. Do you play air guitar?
No, but I air conduct.

29. Has anyone ever proposed to you?
No, but she arranged my proposal to her.

30. Do you take anything in your coffee?
Milk or cream in the first cup o' the morning. After that, it's all black.

31. Do you have any Willow Tree figurines?
I don't even know what that means.

32. What is/was your high school's rival mascot?
I suppose our biggest rival back at Winston Churchill HS (home of the Chargers) were the Robert E. Lee Volunteers. But that was 25 years ago. Who knows now. (BTW, most of the kids in my school were so ignorant as to think a charger was some kind of dragon or sumpin'. I really hated high school.)

33. Last person you spoke to from high school?
Okay, here's a little story. I had my heart seriously broken by a girl I worshipped back in high school. Didn't see her until senior year in college, then again when she passed through London the year after that. She turned out to be dull as ditchwater. Let that be a lesson to you young'uns out there.

34. Last time you used hand sanitizer?
Do I look like a sissy?

35. Would you like to learn to play the drums?
Nah. And don't make that suggestion around my gels, either.

36. What color are the blinds in your living room?
Wood, like the rest of the house.

38. Last thing you read in the newspaper?
I stopped reading the papers. The WSJ has been begging me for some time to re-up. Really, the spectacle they're making of themselves is quite embarrassing. I reckon that if I hold out a bit longer, they'll pay me to subscribe.

39. What was the last pageant you attended?
Pffft.

40. What is the last place you bought pizza from?
Dominoes. So sue me.

41. Have you ever worn a crown?
The crew at the People's Glorious Soviet of Middletown CT used to travel by bus to Philly for the Dad Vails Regatta to cap off our spring season every year. On the way back, we'd stop in Cherry Hill NJ and load up on beer. The beer that was the first alchohol any of us had in many months. On one trip (so I'm told), I put a Budweiser carton on my head and loudly proclaimed myself the King of Beers.

42. What is the last thing you stapled?
Some attachments to a letter at work. You trust guv'mint secretaries to do things right at your peril.

43. Did you ever drink clear Pepsi?
Heck, I don't drink any soda.

44. Are you ticklish?
Yes. I mean, no. No. And don't ask to try me out.

45. Last time you saw fireworks?
When I bonked my skull poking around under in the cubby under the stairs earlier today. Yeeeoch.

46. Last time you had a Krispy Kreme doughnut?
I hate doughnuts.

47. Who is the last person that left you a message & you actually returned it?
Ahhhhh-hahahaha!!! Return a message? Never!

48. Last time you parked under a carport?
In all my years I cannot recall ever having parked under a carport.

49. Do you have a black dog?
No, no dog. Sniff. We used to have a Scottie when I was a kid. He bit everbody.

50 . Have you had your mid life crisis yet?
I believe I'm working on it now.

51. Are you an aunt or uncle?
Yep. One nephew, three nieces.

52. Who has the prettiest eyes that you know of?
The Llama-ettes have six of the most vivid blue eyes you've ever seen.

53. What kind of soap or body wash do you use?
Jeez, I dunno, it's just soap.

54. Do you remember Ugly Kid Joe?
Nope.

55. Do you have a little black dress?
Well, I have a little black dinner jacket that needs a trip to the tailor's before I next appear in public wearing it.

Now where's that damn' food?