December 01, 2006

Gratuitious Lunchtime Musickal Observation

Just went round the corner to Au Bon Pain (French for "The Good Pain") to grab a sammich.

You know, I've always hated musickal medleys. I find those involving Christmas songs to be especially loathsome, in part because I hate most Christmas music written after, say, 1830, but also because it seems that the hacks who put these things out feel they have special license to create the most garish, awful and guts-ache-inducing arrangements. (The one running at the Pain featured a brass treatment of "Walking In A Winter Wonderland" that came out sounding more like Deutchland Uber Alles. Oh well, could have been worse - there could have been singing.)

Who came up with this wretched concept in the first place? Shoot 'em on sight, says I. And is there anybody out there who actually likes these arrangements? If so, get your ears checked. You may have a problem.

(Aaaaah. Those of you who haven't spent Christmas with the Llamas before have no idea how cranky this season makes me. Hold tight - I'm just getting warmed up!)

Posted by Robert at December 1, 2006 01:26 PM | TrackBack
Comments

Dear Mr. Scrooge:

I "rayther" like the Christmas Eve Sarajevo medley by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra, which features a mashup of cello, orchestral bells, and rock instruments doing a hard rock version of Carol of the Bells and God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen. And I have good ears, thank you very much.

Will you be letting Bob Cratchett have the day off this year, or will you take delight in watching Tiny Tim waste away in the snow outside your office waiting for his dad?

Posted by: JohnL at December 1, 2006 02:00 PM

I'm thinking a Christmas-music/Nazi anthem mashup might actually be interesting, in a perverse kind of way. The Horst Wessel Carol of the Bells, Panzerschiffe Rudolf, Preussens Gloria (in Excelsis!), and so forth.

You'd have to combine Mannheim Steamrollwer with Kraftwerk to really get it right.

Posted by: The Colossus at December 1, 2006 02:16 PM

The smart money is on Tiny Tim wasting away, if Robbo doesn't steal his crutch and beat him to death with it.

Posted by: phin at December 1, 2006 02:18 PM

No need to beat Tiny Tim to death, let him slowly freeze to death. Sell the crutch (easier to do without blood on it).

Posted by: rbj at December 1, 2006 02:21 PM

Yeah, I'm going to sell the crutches and then use Tiny Tim's pitiful, frozen body to beat the Llama-ettes.

Posted by: Robbo the LB at December 1, 2006 02:28 PM

I yield to no-one in my preference for music by dead composers over live ones, but aren't you being a little harsh? Some Christmas music of the period 1830-1865 is quite nice.

Posted by: Miriam at December 2, 2006 04:59 PM