Is Our Childrens Learninj?

Me and my big mouth.

Because I possess such a Cliff Clavin-like hoard of useless historickal trivia, and because the Missus is sweet enough to still pretend to believe I know what the hell I'm talking about even after all these years, I've been drafted into restaging the Roman conquest of Britain as part of a class project at St. Marie's of the Blessed Educational Method.

You see, the Missus is doing a unit on medieval history with her lower elementary class this year. In order to set up the story, she plans to teach the kiddies about Celtic Britain, its subjugation and subsequent abandonment by the Romans and its eventual conquest by the Saxons. She came up with the idea of a pitched battle between Celts (complete with blue faces) and the Legions as a way of getting the kiddies enthusiastic about the project.

As regular readers know, the Eight Year Old happens to be in the Missus' class. I think she'd make a perfect Boadicea, as this suits her temperment to a tee. This year, the Six Year Old is also in the class. The trouble-making side in me is strongly tempted to draft her as Governor Suetonius and recreate the Battle of Watling Street in 61 A.D., where the Romans finally put down the Icenis' rebellion.

I can see it now, a small, calm, disciplined body of legionaires led by the younger Llama-ette taking on a howling hoard led by the elder. And defeating it. Call it channelling my inner Victor Davis Hanson.