The LLama Butchers: I'm Steve the LLamabutcher, and I'm an idiot

March 31, 2006

I'm Steve the LLamabutcher, and I'm an idiot

But you knew that already.

Anyhoo, I need your help: no, not for the "Hottie LLama" contest that Sadie Lou is running a pirate bootleg on our site (because we all know who is the mostest cutest LLama anyway), but by helping a friend in need.

One of our oldest and bestest blog buddies is of course Kathy the Cake Eater, and a visit over to Cake Eater Chronicles is a daily requirement over here at Rancho non Sequitor. Kath has been feeling a little bit blue as of late, and wants to take a blogbatical or something, hoping to refresh the batteries etc. etc.

Stick a Fork in Me, I'm Done
Well, my devoted Cake Eater readers, I'm going on hiatus.

I was actually going to start my hiatus next week, but you'll have noticed the dearth of posting lately, it's probably just as well that I do this now.

Now, now, don't be despondent, my devoted Cake Eater readers. Think of all the crap posts I'm sparing you in the meantime.

There are two things that have led to this decision. First, I am just not interested in blogging right now. I'm tired of this vain little world the blogosphere has become. I'm sick of the preening, the posturing, of the bottle of success only opening and filling the glass of the best link whores. I'm sick of it. I know it shouldn't bother me; I've tried not to let it bother me, but you can only churn out content for so long without any payoff.

Second, I have other things I want to expend my energy on. Yes, that means another manuscript. After the last one spontaneously combusted, leaving only a smoldering pile of shit in its place, it's taken a bit to work myself up to it, but I'm readying myself for another go-round on the Novel Carousel (TM). Now this is the same carousel where---ahem--- if you suck, you're forcibly ejected! I haven't the time or energy to expend on blogging if I want to---ahem---actually write something that will sell. I'm tired of writing novels that don't make me any money, because, my devoted Cake Eater Readers, I want to be sitting on a beach sometime soon, being fed bon-bon's by Javier the thong-wearing, well-greased, cabana boy---and that's not going to happen unless I've got lots of coin.

So, I bid you au revoir, my devoted Cake Eater readers. I will be back.

Sometime.

Probably in the summer.

But what better way to help her than to let her know how much we all care.

I'm big into the "random acts of kindness" stuff---I have a bumber sticker on the truck to that effect, right next to the "THIS SUV RUNS ON PURE, CLEAN WHALE OIL" What better way to show the blog luv than giving someone the thing we bloggers all want: the gift of traffic.

So to that end, I've decided the best way we can show Kath how much we LUV Cake Eater Chronicles is give her the #1 ranking on Google for people searching for the 1988 movie Beaches. Because, what movie says what we are trying to do here than Beaches, no?

It shouldn't be that hard: surprisingly, no one has staked out this, um, sand before.

So this is where you come in. I've already started my campaign over at Cake Eater Chronicles itself, what I've modestly titled the "ALL YOUR BEACHES ARE BELONG TO US!" campaign. We need to collectively bomb google with links tying Kathy's blog to the movie Beaches.

Here's the script you'll need:

Beaches Movie blog

Paste, hit return, and then hit paste with the finger down, giving 1 or 200 links.

One week, I think we'll be gold.

Don't do it for me. Do it for Kathy. Do it for Cake Eater Chronicles.

Posted by Steve at March 31, 2006 01:11 PM | TrackBack

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