Things are not looking good for ol' Dan Brown

The plagiarism trial in London against best-selling author Dan Brown, accused of appropriating vast swaths of his novel The Da Vinci Code from two crazed Kiwi lunatics took a bizarre twist yesterday when a companion suit was filed by the producers of the tee-vee show "Hack" against Mr. Brown for stealing their copyrighted theme.

"Dan Brown has set out to establish himself as the biggest hack in the world," argued series creator Dave Keop. "For chrissakes, he wrote the damn book in his mommy's laundry room breathlessly stealing from the half-assed cheezy pseudo-Gnostic works of others. In doing so, he intentionally infringed on our copyrighted idea of establishing himself as the Hack. David Morse's "Mike Olshansky" is the one true Hack, as much as Dan Brown tries to make his "Robert Langdon" otherwise."