Don't say he didn't warn us....

Steve Green on Halloween:

Suddenly, Halloween is more exciting than it was even 25 years ago. Only now, I don't have to ask Mom for permission, and the hints of hotness you enjoy as a youth will be replaced with the actual hotness of being a grown-up with a credit line and very little sense of decency.

So if I seem distracted the next 24 days, you'd better believe your spanked bottom that I'm exactly that.

Read the whole thing.

Meanwhile, back on the island, Michele is asking for help:

If you recall, my kids are having a Halloween party Saturday night. They've already decided on the movies - Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Dawn of the Dead, remakes both - so the rest is up to me.

I need to feed/water and entertain about 12 kids between the ages of 11-14. The movies will do most of the entertaining, but I thought I would add to the night by scaring the living shit out of them. Hey, the deserve it. These kids think there's nothing in the world - no movie, no book, no horrible mask - that could make them lose sleep or, at least, give them the screams for a few minutes.

One idea I had was this: during the height of the best part of TCM, I have my husband stand outside the living room window, wearing a leatherface mask and sporting a real, plugged in chainsaw. I'll pull back the curtains and say something like, check this out! and Justin will rev up the chainsaw.

I've been warned that social services will be at my door just a few minutes after one of the kids drops dead of a heart attack. So, maybe not.

I need your help. I'd love to pull some good pranks on them or find a way to give them just the right amount of scare. Without killing any of them, of course. Well, maybe that one whiny kid.

DJ asked that I try to not make the party cheesy. I take it that he won't want to bob for apples, then. Unless, of course, I put razor blades in the apples to make it exciting!

Is it just me, or is Michele turning into the coolest mom on the internet? (I was going to say that she was turning into Stifler's Mom, but then that would play some real havoc with my Dubya=Steve Stifler meme)