November 16, 2004


If schaubenfraude is the act of taking delight in the on-screen pain and misery of Ben Stiller, as well as the taking delight in the box-office bombing of yet another Ben Affleck movie, what exactly is the philosophical state of watching Renee Zellweger make an arse of herself?

bridge jones.jpeg

I'm not sure, exactly, but Sheila's right in front, throwing popcorn at the screen at the latest loaf of Bridget Jonz. That, and she's anticipating the joyful disaster that Alexander should prove to be (personally, since the movie is directed by Oliver Stone, I'm looking forward to what sort of CIA/ Mossad/ Illumanit/ IRS/ Papacy/ Microsoft/ Starbucks/ Sammy Hagar led Van Halen conspiracy he can cook up for the early demise of the hero. That, and the old dude who played the old (non-gay) Zoro trying to channel Ptolemy, not to mention Captain von Trapp, picking up the guitar, and strumming some new lyrics to the tune of "Edelweis" about the oligarchy being the corrupted form of aristocracy, and how the blended constitution is best. His Aristotle should prove to be as buff as Richard Harris as Marcus Aurelius in Gladiator. Ishtar with War Elephants, bay-bee.

They should have went with Vin Diesel.

UPDATE: In the "gee, that's not really fair" category, our old pal the Unabrewer is bitchslapping Ben Affleck with the ghost of Steve McQueen. Definitely not a fair fight.

Posted by Steve at November 16, 2004 10:59 AM | TrackBack

I've been wondering how Stone would manage to inject Vietnam into Alexander - b/c you know, for him it's all about Vietnam.

Posted by: jen at November 16, 2004 11:25 AM

Well sure....unwinnable land war in asia.

Except, he'll have a problem dealing with the stunning victory at Gaugamela...

Posted by: Steve the LB at November 16, 2004 08:12 PM
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