March 29, 2005


Today we feature another refugee from that over-rated series, Party of Five: Jennifer Love Hewitt. Breakthrough career move:POF where she played Bailey's skank. Best attributes: tight figure, big chest. What has she done since then? Damn little. Perusal of the "Love" website yielded an upcoming movie on the Oxygen channel and a photo spread in the March issue of MAXIM magazine. I always considered the indicia of a starlet career on the skids to be: (1) movies on the estrogen channels (Lifetime and Oxygen); (2) photo shoots in the Renowned Literary Magazine a/k/a Playboy or similar publications; (3) suggestions of lesbian experimentation. Here in JLH, we have two out of three and in the same eight week period to boot. Next movie prediction: she will star as the Russian submarine commander in the Oxygen Channel re-make of K-19: the Widowmaker. Denise Richards will play the executive officer.

Yips! from Robbo: Mhehehehe.... I recently saw an ad for some made for tee vee movie on one of those channels starring Melissa Gilbert (aka Laura Ingells) and Lindsay Wagner (aka The Bionic Woman). Make of that what you will - "Flash in the Pan 70's Babes" - literally, in the case of Gilbert. Last I heard of her she had been elected president of the Screen Actors Guild after a Bush/Gore 2000-like recount, beating out Valerie "Rhoda Morgenstern" Harper. As for Lindsay, well, she has unfortunately descended to one of the lower circles of acting hell, flogging mattresses in tee vee commercials.

Posted by LMC at March 29, 2005 09:28 PM

My kids liked the movie version of Garfield because of the smart-ass cat and cute dog. I could tolerate it only because of the presence of this winsome starlet in the cast.

Posted by: JohnL at March 30, 2005 12:55 AM

Okay now! Don't go taking the name of Jennifer Love Hewitt in vain! You must know that she is the platonic apple of my eye.

And by the way... Confessions of a Sociopathic Social Climber (on Oh! Oxygen) wasn't all that bad. I watched it twice. The first time with sound, the second time muted with my own selection of Sir Georg Solti recordings playing loudly.

Posted by: The Maximum Leader at March 30, 2005 09:17 AM

Jennifer Love Hewitt is a double-threat flash in the pan babe -- she had a flash in the pan singing career, as well. Put out a few albums.

Played Audrey Hepburn in a made for TV movie. Was also in a number of teen slasher pics (the "I Know What You Did Last Summer" series, if I'm not mistaken, where the killer bore a remarkable likeness to the Gorton's fisherman -- also featuring FITB (Flash in the Pan Babe) Gellar.) She was the best thing in the movie "Heartbreakers", which might contain other actors as well, but since it is only watchable in fast-forward-to-Hewitt-scene-mode, I couldn't tell you.

Posted by: The Colossus at March 30, 2005 09:27 AM

Ditto The Colossus on "Heartbreakers."

You know "The Tuxedo" wasn't too bad...

Posted by: The Maximum Leader at March 30, 2005 09:52 AM
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