The grapevine

Rae's spreading urban legends about herself. You know, come to think about it, I did see "Mr. Wrong" in the theaters. I guess that makes me.....

Actually, I quite sympathize with Rae on this one. I teach at a small women's college, so basically anything you do or say is going to become phantasmorgized within half an hour to all parts of the campus. If necessary, they'll just make it up.

My answer? Regularly eat lunch with the fabulous ladies of the phys ed department---it's kind of the anti-Will & Grace show. That, and regularly plant different odd (made up) things around campus about myself as a sort of barium enema to the grapevine---that is, you can track where the gossip travelled from by marking the presence or absence of bizarre little tidbits introduced into the system at various times and places. That way, you get enough bizarre crap out there that makes the various sort of run of the mill rumor and innuendo seem tame by comparison (for example, for two years in my office I had up a fake French Foreign Legion Certificate of Merit that I made up and framed. Now, I have my real Kentucky Colonel commission, right next to the picture of Elvis and Nixon).