Bush Lied!

***LLAMA EXCLUSIVE****MUST CREDIT LLAMAS***

Last evening, I actually watched a few minutes of "Nip/Tuck". I don't know how, exactly, but the exceeding awfulness of this show on every level suddenly gave me a Saul-on-the-road-to-Damascus epiphany that yes, indeed, Dubya lied about the intel in order to hoodwink the country into the Iraqi War.

Well, with the zeal typical of converts, I decided to do some research. And as it turns out, my efforts paid off. Therefore, I give you:

TOP TEN OTHER LIES OF GEORGE W. BUSH

10. That bogus Texas accent.

9. Regularly violates "10 items or fewer" rule in express checkout line at Georgetown Safeway by claiming that the half-dozen Colt .45 singles count as "one six-pack".

8. So-called "home address" on driver's license is actually address of Wrigley Field.

7. Uses stunt double for jogging/biking. Real "workout" consists of sacking out on Lay-Z-Boy with box of Krispy Kremes watching Oprah.

6. Is holding Cindy Sheehan's son at Gitmo - threatens summary execution unless she continues to make fool of herself in public.

5. Jenna and Barbra actually intergalactic princesses in hiding from their evil Sith Lord father.

4. Has been covering up economic collapse for months by carefully holding charts upside down at all press conferences.

3. Ordered Hurricane Katrina strike on New Orleans after learning One Ring had been lost in nearby bayou - wanted to clear out local population so FEMA could search unhindered.

2. Not only did he know about 9/11 attacks beforehand, also arranged deal whereby he would order Air Force to stand down in exchange for hijackers' frequent flier miles.

1. Technically, it should be "Madame President".