May 26, 2005

Oh, The Humanity!

Following up on Michelle Malkin's and INDCent Bill's columns today about the Left's and the MSM's apparent blind desire to believe anything alleged by the prisoners at Guantanimo Bay, we Llamas present for your consideration (with apologies to Dave):

THE TOP TEN OTHER GITMO PRISONER ALLEGATIONS

10. Camp cinema charging full price for matinee showings of Star Wars III.

9. Forced to milk 100 cows every morning before walking four miles to holding cell and back. In the snow. Up hill. Both ways.

8. Took my liver even though I was still using it.

7. Head held under water for three hours straight before every meal.

6. Forced us to move entire island of Cuba six feet to the left. Then forced us to move it back.

5. You think photos of Saddam in his undies are disturbing? They're showing us Fidel in a thong!

4. Beaten by guards whenever we ask to buy a vowel during camp "Wheel of Fortune" tourney.

3. Forced to cut down a tree with a herring.

2. They've killed me five times already, but my insurance company will only pay out the benefits once!

1. Routinely shuttling us to Klingon Home World for some serious ass-whuppin'.

Posted by Robert at May 26, 2005 09:33 AM
Comments

A herring?

We want... a shrubbery!

Posted by: Mr.Kurtz at May 26, 2005 12:27 PM

This is funny stuff Robert.

Posted by: Florid aBill at May 26, 2005 12:28 PM

Fidel in a thong? At least it wasn't Michael Moore.

Posted by: rbj at May 26, 2005 02:47 PM

Barbra Streisand in a thong?

Call Amnesty....

Posted by: Joe at May 26, 2005 03:33 PM

5.5 Took away TV privileges for the season-ending cliffhanger of Lost. What happened? What does it all mean?

Posted by: Sarge6 at May 26, 2005 03:52 PM

Eeeeewwwwww: Fidel in a Thong

It's gonna take a week or two to get THAT mental picture out of my mind!

I still think they should make a Survivor-type series out of it, with maybe a touch of Fear Factor thrown in. Just think of the possible reward challenges! Immunity challenges! Vote 'em off the island one at a time, then ship 'winner' to new facility.

With all those cameras stuck in their faces 24/7, some info is bound to surface.

Plus, this would be a long-running series, with enormous profits. Sell broadcast rights to highest bidder, reduce national debt.

Posted by: Greg at May 26, 2005 04:59 PM

Greg, it has been done, Marathon Man?

Posted by: Blaine at May 27, 2005 04:18 PM

FANTASTIC TOP TEN LIST!!!! GENIUS MATERIAL!!!

Posted by: David Drake at May 27, 2005 04:28 PM
Post a comment









Remember personal info?