So many great lines in that movie. It is a Dangerfield highlight reel, among other things. I myself like Ty's reason for avoiding Vietnam.

"Homo. Much better now."

Judge Smails: "How do you measure yourself against other golfers if you don't keep score?"

Ty: "By height".

From Caddy Shack - Ty: "Danny, there's a force in this universe that makes things happen, and all you need to do is get in touch with it. Close your eyes, find your center, and...be the ball".

Judge Smales: "...and I'm no slouch myself". Ty: "Don't sell yourself short, Judge. You're a tremendous slouch".

"This place is restricted, Wang, so don't tell 'em you're Jewish."

So I jump ship in Hong Kong and make my way over to Tibet, and I get on as a looper at a course over in the Himalayas. A looper, you know, a caddy, a looper, a jock. So, I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. Twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking. So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one -- big hitter, the Lama -- long, into a ten-thousand foot crevice, right at the base of this glacier. And do you know what the Lama says? Gunga galunga...gunga -- gunga galunga. So we finish the eighteenth and he's gonna stiff me. And I say, "Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know." And he says, "Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consiousness." So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.

(Via CarlSpackler.com)

You're rather attractive for a beautiful girl with a great body.

Can I fix you a drink? Tuna Coloda perhaps?

Ahoy Palloy. Where'd you just come from - a Scotch Ad?

Angie - pick up that blood.

(after Ty's ball ends up on the crow's beak)

Al: That's good luck.

Ty: In Haiti.

You're not a man. You're a Bishop - for God's sake!

I've sent kids younger than you to the gas chamber. Didn't want to do it. Felt I owed it to them.

Lacy: What season, duck?

Ty: (laughs) No, dolphin.

No that was Mitch Cumstein, my roommate.

Lacy: My uncle says you've got a screw loose.

Ty: Your uncle molests collies.

Bluegrass - Kentucky Bluegrass. Feather bed Bent. And Northern California Sensimilla. Good thing about this stuff is, you can play 36 holes on it in the afternoon, take some home and get stoned to the Begezzus Belt.

Lacy: This stuff is terrible.

Ty: Yeah, it's great, isn't it. You just don't know how to do it.

(singing) I was born to love you. I was born to lick your face. I was born to rub you. But you were born to rub me first.

It's the best man. I got it from a Negro. You're probably so high you don't even know it.

Hey man save me a poke.

Noonan, you can do it.