Air Llama Roundup

Well, I can say this about my trip down to the Florida Gulf Coast on Friday - I'm reasonably sure I was the only man in the greater Tampa-St. Pete area actually wearing a tie. (Mom remarked rather dryly that she was surprised I wasn't the only one wearing a shirt.)

I flew out on an airline called "Ted" . That's it - just "Ted". "Ted" was remarkably happy to see me. "Ted" thought it was a great day to fly. "Ted" was glad I was aboard. Just so there wouldn't be any confusion, "Ted" even slapped his name on the side of the plane in twenty foot high letters. "Call me 'Ted,'" he kept saying. "This 'United Airlines' nonsense is so formal for buddies like us, right?"

Message to Edward: Sir, you presume too much. Your over-familiarity is unwelcomed and your faux casualness, a hideous example of corporate groupthink if I ever saw one, is not appreciated. I would prefer very much if we kept our relationship on a strictly professional level. You just concentrate on driving the damn plane. I don't want to be your buddy.

(FWIW, I was sitting up near the bulkhead and overheard a lot of the stewardess' talk. They were snickering about the whole "Ted" idea themselves and consoling themselves with the fact that at least they weren't unfortunate enough to be flying on Delta's subsidiary "Song".)