Dave Barry, writing from the GOP Convention, has some disturbing fantasies:
I tried to get into a party hosted by Rep. David Dreier of California at a bowling alley in Greenwich Village, but they wouldn't let me in, so I can't say what went on in there. For all I know, Rep. Dreier had carnal relations with a llama.But that is pointless speculation, since, as I said, they refused to let me in, apparently because they don't care about Freedom of the Press, not to mention the welfare of innocent animals.
Let me just assure you, Dave. Didn't happen. Ain't gonna.
Yips! to Taranto, who's got a great round-up of Global Village Idiots today as well.
Attention all Movable Type v. 2.64 users! Where's the freakin' spell-check on this thing? I'm embarrassing meself.
He of the Vodka, shaker and chilled glass links to and quotes Josh Marshall's attempt to get the Donks to keep calm, also indulging in a little well-earned "I told you so"-ing along the way.
Actually, I think Josh is half right and half wrong, while Stephen is definitely on the right track. Josh believes the recent signs of panic are simply par for the course with the Dem mentality, but I think it goes farther than that this year. Why? Because the Dems are trying to pull a fast one - they've nominated a dovish liberal who, on the basis of nothing but a few months of combat 35 years ago, is trying to convince the American public that he'd be a bona fide Wartime President. In other words, to modify Stephen's metaphor just a bit, they're trying to win the pot on a pair of twos.
The Donks know perfectly well that Kerry's campaign strategy is a fraud. Their worst nightmare is that the Voters will see right through it and call 'em. From recent poll numbers and other signs, it looks like this is beginning to happen. Yeah, I'd probably start getting the heebie-jeebies too.
Finally, after much fooling about and at my own expense, thank you very much, I managed to have the last of my "stuff" transported from my old office to my new digs. Among the two most important items: my radio/CD player and my coffee-maker.
Despite the fact that I'm in an interior office, my radio picks up the local classical station reasonably well. However, what interference there is causes a kind of cricket-chirping effect. This proved very humorous a while ago when NPR ran an audio clip of J. Francois Kerry's address to the American Legion Convention today. Made it seem as if he was addressing one of those silent, stone-faced cartoon crowds. Which probably wasn't that far from the truth.
As to the coffee-maker - Ah! sweet ambrosial beverage of the Gods! Since this is a government office, there's no free coffee to get one through the day. And assimilation by the Starbucks Borg is no longer financially reasonable for me. But having procured a can of french roast of my own, I can now go to town. In between having to get up at 5:30 AM, being back to regular hard work and having not slept well recently, I need all the java I can get.
I forgot to mention this earlier, but I think it's kinda neat.
There were plenty of camera shots of Dick Cheney and family last night on Fox's Convention coverage, as there had been the night before. (I have never seen Dick Cheney with any expression on his face other than that half-smile of his. At the same time, he always looks like he's about two seconds away from clutching his chest and keeling over.)
Anyway, last night, the Missus and I noticed at one point a little girl hanging around with the Veep. She must have been about fourish or so - long, darkish hair. I am just about positive she was/is one of Cheney's granddaughters. There is also an extremely good chance that she was the one christened in the same baptismal service as was our own four year old girl. The Llama-ette's Godfather? Steve-O. The Cheney girl's Godfather? Dick himself. They stood right next to each other during the presentation, with self but a few feet away.
Looking at the girl, my first thought was how fast she'd grown. Then I had to remember that my own wasn't a baby anymore either.
My good friend Sparky, aka "Mrs. Friend" is blogging recommendations for Christmas books for the kids. Seriously, this is the time to start thinking about this sort of thing. I know the Missus is already revving in to high gear.
As far as the books themselves go, I don't have much to say except that I believe that Sparky and I have very similar opinions as to what Christmas is actually supposed to mean and her descriptions of this selection amply illustrate her priorities.
I'll throw in one Cranky Tory (TM) anectdote about Christmas and the Culture. As corny as it sounds, I never cease to get all misty-eyed when Linus recites Luke 2:8-14 (KJV, of course) in A Charlie Brown Christmas. To me, that is one of the rare moments when pop culture - in this case in the form of a simple, badly animated cartoon - gets it absolutely bang on. Very moving. I hope my kids feel the same way some day. If so, I'll have done my job, at least on the spiritual front.
Yips! to Anne the Barely Attentive Mother, who has an interesting round-up of Mommy Blogs fitting for the impending start of the school year. (Like Anne's, my kids don't go back for another week.)
The local classical station just put on Brahms' Third Symphony. As a fanatical devotee of Fawlty Towers, I can never hear the opening measures of this piece without imagining a wild-eyed John Cleese yelling, "That's Brahms! Brahms' Third Racket!"
I very rarely bore you lot with talk about myself. However, I feel I should mention that I've had the same nightmare three nights in a row now. This is unfair.
It's one of those awful anxiety dreams. In it, I think I'm lying in bed awake. All the kids are in our room and various improbable disasters constantly threaten them - ceiling falling in, arrows out of the dark, falling off the bed, etc. - despite my frantic efforts to shield them.
It's positively exhausting. And I can't imagine why I'm having anxiety dreams now - I'm quite content and excited about my new job and all, and everything else is going just fine. Perhaps it's just some kind of post facto venting. Perhaps it's just that I don't like change very much and typically take a little while to adjust to new things.
Either way, what's the point of trying to go to sleep if you just wind up making yourself more tired?
I've got an FBI agent coming in here in a while to interview me as part of my U.S. Gov'mint (TM) security check. So you guys just pretend you don't know me for a while. M'kay?
UPDATE: Okay, he's gone. The man was a ringer for that Sienfeld Library Cop. No j'accuse! surprises, although he did ask a screwball question at the end that demonstrated he's already done a fair bit of snooping.
I'm off to Chicago today for the American Politcial Science Association meeting, so posting will be lighter from me for the next couple of days.
If anyone has any suggestions for places to eat/drink/go, I'd appreciate it. I love Chicago--it's my favorite city to visit. I love walking around, soaking it all in. This time I'm staying at the Sheraton right on the river by the Wrigley Building, which is going to be fab---I've wanted to stay there for awhile. It's close to everything, except where I'm giving my paper, which is down at the (1968 Riot) Hilton, which is a bit of a hike. Oh well.
Later this fall, when the deadline is approaching for submitting a paper proposal for next year, I'm going for an all out blitz to make sure Herr Doktor Shackleford is going to go too: I'm thinking a panel on "Neo-Institutional Analysis of Attitudinal Factors Shaping News Coverage: The View From Inside the Sandcrawler" might do the trick.
Anyhoo, there's a good chance I'll be in the bar of the either the Sheraton, the Palmer House or the Riot Hilton tonight, and hey, I'm buying the first round!
(SPECIAL SECRET MESSAGE TO ROB:) My theory is correct, bay-bee! Plus, I rebooted the template and dumped the bumper sticker icons--I think they might have been too wide. Let me know how this looks.
I flipped on Fox News Channel about 9:30 or so to see what was going on. I didn't take notes and I'm sure everybody else in the Universe will link to transcripts, so here are my general impressions of last night's Prime Time speakers:
Ahnold - Like Giuliani the night before, Der Governator was having the time of his life up on the podium. This is the kind of political figure that drives his opponents to drink: telegenic, at ease, humorous, a lot smarter than he pretends to be. And his speech, if lacking in any real substance, was politically untouchable: The Immigrant Dream. Mom and Apple Pie. Ameerica and Collyvornia. Republicans rock. What fun!
Barbara and Jenna - I can't think of a nice way to say this: they blew. Who the hell vetted this routine? Cosmo Kramer? When Jenna made that joke about Sex in the City, the Missus and I turned to each other aghast. At that moment, the FNC camera was dialed in on some elderly silver-haired matron in the crowd. You could almost see the blast wave mussing her coif as the joke went rocketing over her head, but she had a look on her face that suggested she knew enough to consider the whole thing in pretty bad taste. So did I. I think the Twins realized that they were in trouble early on - both looked like they wanted to make a run for it. Fortunately, I don't think their performance is really going to matter much in the overall scheme of things. The GOP should just take its mulligan and move on.
Laura - I was beginning to fade in and out while she spoke, so I can't offer too much commentary on what she said. From what I remember, it seemed about what anyone could reasonably expect: George is a great guy. That's just fine. She could have said anything short of announcing that she was having an affair with Rosie O'Donnell and I think it would have passed muster. The unspoken point of having Laura speak at all was simply to demonstrate that she wasn't a flaky whack-job like Theya-RAY-Suh.
Some other FNC-specific observations:
- I don't watch talking heads shows very much at all. But it seems that every time I catch a couple of minutes of Hannity & Colmes, Sean is handing Alan his head on a plate. Doesn't Combes ever get tired of this?
- Hannity interviewed McCain last night and McCain got ranting about 527's and campaign finance reform. So far as I could understand his argument, McCain seems to think that McCain-Feingold is good legislation because the Supreme Court upheld its constitutionality. Mmmmmm'kay. Hannity kept pressing McCain on why unlimited funding with full disclosure wouldn't be a better idea. McCain wouldn't bite except to say that some senators have testified that big money influences elections. Gasp! Stop the presses!
- Charlie Rangle was on as well. I have a strong suspicion that he was drunk. That's the most charitable explanation for the stream of blather flowing from his mouth.